


green // red

by exarite



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Alcohol, Alternate Universe, Angst, Character's Name Spelled as Viktor, Drunk Sex, Infidelity, Jealousy, M/M, Misunderstandings, POV Multiple, Pining, Pole Dancing, Unreliable Narrator
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-10
Updated: 2021-02-23
Packaged: 2021-02-26 17:24:37
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 32,538
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23573290
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/exarite/pseuds/exarite
Summary: Chris has had many lovers in the years that Viktor has known him. However, none of them can even compare to Chris’s newest boyfriend.Viktor knows it’s wrong, but he falls in love with Yuuri Katsuki anyway.::Chris doesn't know what's wrong with Viktor, but damn. He just wants to set him up with one of his dearest friends.
Relationships: Katsuki Yuuri/Victor Nikiforov
Comments: 62
Kudos: 185





	1. in which there is a banquet and chris is the feast

**Author's Note:**

> i took this down maybe two years ago bcos i was unhappy with it, but after time and distance, it's okay... i edited it a bit, combined green light and red light, and it's alright 😂
> 
> i originally wrote this 4 years ago.... my writing has changed a lot since then, and i'm not in the YOI fandom anymore, but! let's go!

Sunday, February 12

“Yuuuuuuuri!”

Chris grins, bounding over to encircle his arms around the younger man's waist from behind. Yuuri visibly flinches before he looks over his shoulder to meet Chris’s amused gaze, a deep red flush on his pale cheeks.

“C-Chris!” Yuuri indignantly splutters. “I told you to stop sneaking up on me like that!” 

Chris only laughs, squishes Yuuri tighter to his bare chest.

“Aww but Yuuri!” he croons. “You’re just so cute when you blush! You know I can’t help myself.” 

Before Yuuri can even push him off, Chris leans in towards him to place a wet kiss on Yuuri's still red cheeks.

“CHRIS!” Yuuri squeals, breaking free from Chris’s loose embrace. He skitters away to an arms-length distance, his hands held up defensively in front of him. 

Chris laughs at his flustered expression.

“Get your clothes off, Yuuri,” he says sternly. He wags his index finger and shakes his head, his lips in a mock pout. 

Yuuri blushes an even brighter red before he sighs, his shoulders slumping. His hands come up, almost hesitantly, to rest on the hem of his hoodie. 

Chris smiles. He gives Yuuri’s outfit a once over. From what he can see, Yuuri's not wearing anything underneath the large, almost oversized hoodie and the booty shorts that the rest of the students in their class are fond of wearing.

“You and I both know that you’re wearing too many clothes,” he teases. He reaches over to tug on Yuuri’s hoodie for good measure. 

Yuuri smiles a bit and then winks at him, good lord. There’s a challenge in his eyes when Chris meets his gaze head-on. Now  _ there’s  _ the Yuuri that Chris keeps trying to goad out.

“I think I can show you up today, Giacometti,” he says simply and Chris laughs.

“Alright,” he agrees, fond and amused. “Show me how it’s done then.”

Yuuri takes off his hoodie, and Chris can't help but let out a teasing, appreciative whistle at the slim body he reveals. Almost instantly, Yuuri withdraws again and tries to cover himself.

“Stop!” he whines. “I’m trying to get into the mindset!”

Chris giggles. He places a firm hand on Yuuri’s bare shoulder and pushes him gently, but insistently, towards one of the poles. Floor to ceiling mirrors surround them on each side of the studio. 

As they approach the center, Yuuri keeps his head down. He tosses his hoodie to a corner, his shoulders still stiff with tension. Chris smiles widely and pats Yuuri’s hair. He’s trying to calm Yuuri down, but he doesn’t think it’s working very well.

Once Yuuri is in place beside the center pole, Chris steps away to a respectable distance.

"Show me what you've got, Katsuki.”

Monday, February 13

_ Monday’s are the worst _ , Viktor muses to himself as he taps the steering wheel with his finger. He’s proven right when the moment he pulls over to Yuri’s dance studio, his cousin slams the car door open.

“Don't forget to pick me up later,” Yuri growls before he grabs his bag and shuts Viktor’s car door closed with a bang. Viktor winces and his fingers twitch in an aborted motion to pat his car in comfort.

“You’re welcome,” he dryly says to Yuri’s retreating form. Of course, the teen doesn’t hear him since he’s already ferociously kicking open the building’s doors.

If, well, ferocious is the kind of word you'd use to describe a little kitten.

Viktor hums, pressing a finger to his lip as he muses over what he can do while waiting for Yuri's ballet class to end. He should probably pass by the restroom first since he didn't have time this morning, what with Yuri almost kicking his door down in a demand to be driven to class when Viktor had just barely woken up himself. He nods decisively to himself as he parks his car in one of the open parking slots.

As he slips out the driver’s seat, Viktor hears a ding from his phone. He pulls it out as he walks towards the building, and he smiles when he sees it’s from Chris.

_ R u free right now for lunch???  _

_ Perfect _ . He has something to do while waiting for Yuri. A quick shopping trip with Chris will be a welcome distraction.

He taps out a reply and really, people always say that Viktor tends to hyper-focus on things, but Viktor really should be looking where he’s going. 

Viktor bumps into navy blue, and in his surprise, he drops his phone. Whoever he just bumped into stumbles backward, their hands automatically reaching out to grab hold of Viktor’s coat and Viktor grasps onto them instinctively so that they don’t fall.

They stare at each other in stunned silence. Viktor’s mouth dries, and he swallows.

_ Stunning _ , is all he can think as he stares into warm, wide hazel eyes underneath blue-rimmed glasses. Viktor’s eyes slide down to chapped, slightly parted lips, and Viktor feels a sudden, insane temptation to rub his thumb over them. The man he's holding on to is sweaty, his black hair disheveled and sticking to his forehead, but oddly, Viktor finds even that attractive. 

From the corner of his eye, he sees a bead of sweat rolling down the other man's face, and an urge rises from within him to lick it off.

“Wow,” Viktor breathes out. The man that Viktor is holding onto blushes bright red and Viktor is treated once more to the sight of his wonderful, flushed cheeks. He belatedly realizes that he exclaimed that out loud, but he’s not even ashamed. The other man deserves to hear praises.

The angel abruptly lets go of Viktor, and Viktor immediately mourns the lost of contact. He pouts slightly before he remembers his phone and bends down to pick it up, just as the other man bends down too. Their heads knock against each other and both of them pull back.

"Owww," Viktor whines and rubs his head. He chuckles to himself inwardly as the thought of what Mila would say flashes through his mind. What would she call this situation again? A meet cute?

"Sorry," the man apologizes, a blush forming on his cheeks.

Viktor can't help but give him a charming smile as he bends down again to pick up his phone. He's way too pleased to see the return of blush on pale cheeks than he should be.

"It's fine," Viktor replies gently, checking his phone for any cracks. Thankfully, there are none, and he sends the text he was typing out to Chris before he bumped into the cutest man in the world.

"You can make it up to me by telling your name," Viktor says smoothly as he looks up from his phone. He tilts his head and sends a practiced wink.

"Y-Yuuri," the other man squeaks out, obviously flustered but still so very cute.

"Ah," Viktor repeats slowly in amusement. What are the odds that he has the same name as his bratty cousin? 

"Yuuri," Viktor repeats, letting his tongue roll sensually over the name. A flirtatious smile quirks his lips upward.

Yuuri reddens again. Viktor is a little worried at how addicted he's getting to seeing the color high on Yuuri's cheekbones. The other man is so easily flustered and it's endearing. Viktor's enjoying it a little too much.

"My name is Viktor." He smiles, putting in extra effort to make it extra charming.

"I know," Yuuri blurts out, and Viktor's eyebrows raise. A mildly horrified look crosses Yuuri's face. "I--I mean, um, I, you," he stutters before he clasps his hands over his mouth in embarrassment.

Before Viktor can reply, a voice yells out, "Yuuri! Hurry up, you're late!"

Yuuri's head snaps to look at the newcomer down the hall in surprise before he glances at Viktor. Viktor notices the regretful look Yuuri shoots his way before the other man bows deeply in apology.

"I-I'm sorry, it was, it was nice meeting you, Viktor," Yuuri says quickly, ears turning red before he rushes past Viktor.

Viktor watches him go and immediately groans when he realizes he didn't even get Yuuri's number. He pouts to himself. Maybe he can just offer to bring Yuri to class again so that he’d have another chance to see Mr. Cute.

This Monday was turning out not so bad, all things considered.

Chris is rambling about his latest conquest and really, as a Good Friend™, Viktor is obligated to listen.

"He's so perfect," Chris purrs as he latches onto Viktor's arm and grips it tightly.

"Where'd you meet this guy again?" he asks.

"Why, in my pole dancing class of course!" Chris beams like a child and clasps his hands together as he skips ahead. Chris has the tendency to go on and on, and Viktor is used enough to it now that he can tune Chris out like a professional. He pulls out his phone and unlocks it before he goes to his messages.

Viktor's embarrassed to admit that his mind is still stuck on hazel eyes, chapped lips and the deep flush on kissable cheeks. He knows he should be listening to Chris, but Yuuri is front and center in his mind. Yuuri might not be the most attractive person Viktor’s ever met, but there’s something about him that makes Viktor want.

He texts Yuri and tries to subtly ask about a man with the same name as him. Would it be a little too much to hope that his cousin could grant an easy way to Yuuri? They had a class in the same building. It wasn't too impossible, right?

"Viktor!" Chris’s voice draws him out of his reverie. There's a scolding note to it that Viktor is all too familiar with. "Were you even listening?" 

Viktor sheepishly laughs. He deletes his text to Yuri and pockets his phone again. Yuri probably wouldn’t help him anyway.

"Of course I was!" he insists and rubs the back of his head. Chris gives him a suspicious look that's too close to glaring, and he raises a perfect eyebrow at Viktor.

"What did I last say then?" Chris challenges.

Viktor blinks. He was hoping Chris wouldn't ask him that.

"Um."

"Hah," Chris smugly says as he pushes his blonde hair back with well-manicured fingers, "knew it."

Viktor shrugs and beams. He's not ashamed, not even when Chris fondly shakes his head and pushes Viktor’s shoulder. He doesn’t want to be blunt, but even with three sets of hands, it won’t be enough to count the number of lovers that Chris has had in the time Viktor's known him. 

To be fair, Viktor's had a fair amount himself. Not quite as much, maybe, but just as fleeting. 

"I won't tell you his name then," Chris announces and Viktor looks up to give him a look that hopefully conveys what he wants to say.

"I'm sure I'll meet him during your birthday anyway, Chris," he says slowly, "and I'm sure I'm going to see enough of your boyfriend during your pole dancing routine." At least Viktor knows about that.

Chris laughs, giddy as he reaches over to pinch his cheek. Viktor bats his hand away.

"Don't be jealous, Viktor!" Chris teases. He gives Viktor an outrageous wink. "You know you're my fave, I'm not replacing you." 

Sometimes, Viktor really didn't understand how Chris’s boyfriends could put up with how easily Chris flirted with everyone.

"You better not."

Friday, February 17

“Why am I even here?” Yuri growls. Viktor rolls his eyes. Yuri glowers at him. “I’m like 15, I can’t drink, I can’t do shit, I don’t even know why you brought me here.”

“I told you, I’m babysitting you,” Viktor tiredly explains as he rubs his hand over his face. He looks around them and frowns before his eye catches on red. He sees Mila chatting to Sara Crispino and Viktor beams.

“Hey, Yuri,” Viktor says cheerfully. Yuri looks up to give him a scowl. “Mila’s over there, why don’t you go talk to her, huh?” He pushes Yuri towards her and immediately backs away so that he can get a drink for himself.

“Hey!” Yuri squawks, but Viktor’s already melded into the crowd of people dancing.

He sighs in relief once he gets to the drinks table. There’s a big bowl of  _ something  _ that looks like punch, and Viktor shrugs. He gets himself a cup.

He hears a loud cheer and he looks up, half expecting to see Chris stripping already. All he sees is a crowd surrounding something. Viktor frowns before he takes another sip and starts to make his way back.

When he finally pushes his way past the crowd, his mouth drops open. 

There, his little cousin is apparently in a dance-off with the man he’s been  _ obsessing _ over for the past few days.

He stares, stunned at the sight.

Yuuri looks different from how he looked a few days earlier, but Viktor is sure that it’s still him. He’s not wearing his glasses anymore, and his hair is slicked back, but he still looks unfairly attractive.

“I didn’t know Yuri could breakdance,” Mila snickers from beside him. Viktor silently nods. He figured that Yuuri could dance, but Viktor didn’t expect him to be able to dance hip hop so well and so flawlessly.

Viktor himself couldn’t dance, but music was something he knew and right now, Yuuri was dancing to the music so beautifully, Viktor wouldn’t be surprised if the music was coming from his body.

“Why…How did this happen?” he asks Mila. 

She rolls her eyes. “Apparently, Yuri offended that guy over there recently. They’re in the same ballet class, and Yuri called him a pig.”

Viktor lets out an affronted noise. Sure, he noticed the little bit of baby fat on Yuuri’s cheeks and around his waist, but Yuuri still had a slim, strong and beautiful body. He realizes that he should have asked Yuri about Yuuri since they did apparently know each other. 

But, well, Yuuri’s here anyway. It must be fate.

Soon, it’s very obvious that Yuuri is the winner. Viktor smirks before he claps and cheers with the rest of the crowd. He’s about to make his way over to Yuuri to talk to him, maybe get his number this time, when Yuuri himself looks up.

Yuuri’s eyes widen and before Viktor knows what’s happening, he’s rushing over to Viktor.

“Dance with me,” he gasps out.

Viktor’s eyes widen before he’s pulled into the center of the circle. Viktor doesn’t dance, but if it means he gets to have his hands on Yuuri and spend time with him, he gladly will.

“What are you doing?!” His little cousin yells and Viktor looks back to send him a grin and a wink. Yuri looks livid but Viktor can’t bring himself to care.

“Hey,” Yuuri breathes, and Viktor’s attention is caught by him once more. Yuuri keeps his grip on Viktor’s hand and his other wraps around Viktor’s waist. He starts to lead Viktor into a tango and Viktor’s eyebrows shoot up.

The music surrounding them is all wrong for this but Viktor doesn’t care. With the expert way Yuuri is dancing and leading Viktor, he’s making his own music and Viktor can easily ignore the atrocious pop music blaring from the speakers. Viktor’s fingers twitch with the urge to play. He can practically taste and hear the sounds of violins and the sexy, erotic arrangement of the piano and strings.

Viktor doesn’t dance, but with the way Yuuri leads him, he can pretend that he does. He lets himself go. He lets himself be led. For the first time in a long time, Viktor lets himself laugh, unabashedly and without shame.

He has never felt anything like this before, he realizes as Yuuri dips him and brushes a tender hand over his cheek. He looks up with a huge smile and lets himself feel as Yuuri worms his way into his heart.

All too soon, Yuuri is bringing him up and smiling at him. Viktor can’t help but give him a dazed smile back. He opens his mouth to ask, but he’s not sure what he’s going to ask for. His number? His heart? A date?

“Be right back,” Yuuri mumbles, his grip strong on Viktor’s shirt and his warm brown eyes wide and dilated. Viktor blinks as Yuuri lets go of his shirt and then stumbles away. He watches in amusement as Yuuri heads toward Chris’ bathroom and notes to himself that Yuuri seemed at least a little bit familiar with Chris’ apartment already.

Viktor will give himself time first to think about what to say. Then he’ll ask for Yuuri’s number and hopefully charm him off his feet as Yuuri had charmed him.

“Viktor!”

He turns to face Sara and Mila, both of them sporting devious grins.

“Yes, girls?” He says smoothly and they look at each other and smirk.

“We were just wondering about Chris’ pole dancing performance and if it would push through,” Mila says and flutters her eyelashes at him. 

Viktor gives her an amused smile. “Aren’t you supposed to be watching Yuri?” he asks.

Mila rolls her eyes. “He made Georgi bring him home after he lost that dance-off, you know how he’s a sore loser,” she drawls and Viktor chuckles, unsurprised. 

“All right, I’ll go remind Chris then,” he replies. Mila and Sara grin, high-fiving each other. He leaves them be and wonders where he can find Chris. 

“Chris, Chris, Chris, Chris!” 

Viktor blinks at the loud cheers. His question is answered by the group surrounding a table in the other room and cheering loudly for his friend. He hurries over to them and he sees Chris with a shot glass in hand and about to down it. Viktor touches Chris’ shoulder and his friend jolts in surprise, looking up at him with dazed green eyes and smiling.

“Viktor!” Chris cheers and shoves the shot glass into Viktor’s hands. Viktor just barely holds on it, wincing. Chris insistently pushes it up towards his mouth and so Viktor lets Chris pour it, swallowing it down quickly. It burns going down and Viktor licks his lips, tasting it again.

“Chris, you promised the crowd a pole dance and the girls are insisting you push through,” Viktor says dryly. He pats Chris’ cheek gently. 

Chris looks up at him with doe eyes, his eyelashes fluttering.

“Aw, don't pretend you don't want to see me pole dance, Vicky!” Chris giggles. Viktor can’t help but roll his eyes before he drags Chris towards his living room where the pole is.

Chris stares at the pole in contemplation, an odd look on his face, and Viktor frowns at his silence.

“I can’t,” Chris mournfully moans. Viktor stares at him in confusion.

“What do you mean you can’t? Are you—Are you too drunk or something?” Viktor asks, his brows drawing together. Chris is never too drunk for anything; he has a much higher tolerance than Viktor. Chris owns a nightclub and drinks every chance he gets.

“No,” Chris scoffs in irritation, blatantly offended at the idea of being  _ too drunk _ to dance. “I choreographed a pair pole dance to perform with my sweet darling and I can’t perform it without—” Chris stops mid-speech as he seems to notice something across the room. 

Viktor looks up and his heart skips a beat when he sees Yuuri stumble through the open arch. He automatically smiles.

“Yuuri!” Chris squeals. He runs across his living room to tackle Yuuri, and Yuuri catches him. 

Viktor stares at the obviously familiar way his best friend and the man of his dreams are touching each other. A gnawing feeling starts to grow in his gut. He feels cold. 

Viktor pushes it down and makes his way slowly towards them, his gaze stuck on the couple. Chris is naturally affectionate with most of his friends, that doesn't mean—

Yuuri kisses Chris’s cheek. 

Viktor freezes. A doubt is niggling in his mind but Viktor doesn’t want to think about it, doesn’t want to address the what if…Yuuri says something to Chris then, Viktor isn’t sure what.

Chris rambles to Yuuri and he’s too far away to hear what Chris is saying or what Yuuri says in reply. He unsticks his feet and continues to walk towards them, despite the feeling of heavy iron dragging him down.

He’s finally beside them and he’s treated to a closeup of Chris cheering and wrapping his arms around Yuuri’s neck, of Yuuri wrapping his own around Chris’ waist before pressing their foreheads together.

Viktor swallows the ball down in his throat and opens his mouth. 

“Hello,” he greets, hoping that his voice doesn’t betray the weird feeling in his chest. Yuuri and Chris both look up at him, and Viktor is drawn again to pretty brown eyes. He’s vaguely aware that he must be staring intensely at Yuuri but he can’t stop. Yuuri couldn’t possibly be Chris’s newest boyfriend…

“Viktor,” Chris slurs, “This is Yuuri Katsuki, isn’t he perfect?” Chris beams at him and Viktor feels his stomach drop.

Chris leans forward and taps his chest. “He’s from my pole dancing class and he’s going to dance with me,” Chris announces and gives Viktor a meaningful look. Viktor isn’t prepared for the wave of disappointment that washes through him at the confirmation of his suspicions. Chris had mentioned he was dancing with his boyfriend and that he met his boyfriend from his pole dancing class.

A + B = C

Yuuri was Chris' boyfriend.

He can barely hear Chris introducing him to Yuuri. The only thing he sees is Yuuri, tilting his head at him so flirtatiously. Viktor swallows down the now familiar want he feels whenever Yuuri even so much as looks at him.

“I know who he is,” Yuuri says simply and smiles at him. Viktor’s surprised at the obvious heat that’s still in his gaze and his tone. Chris looks at Yuuri, his eyebrows raised in surprise at his boyfriend so obviously flirting with his best friend.

Viktor coughs, covering his mouth. If this was earlier, he would have flirted back, would have accepted the look in Yuuri’s eyes and pushed it farther with his own. But now that he knows that the object of his desire is his friend’s boyfriend, it feels dirty and wrong.

Chris grabs Yuuri’s hands and Viktor’s gaze snaps to their linked hands immediately, an uncomfortable feeling rising in his chest. Chris drags him away somewhere, presumably towards the pole, but Viktor is rooted in his spot.

He stares despondently at where Chris and Yuuri were previously standing in front of him. How could he be so stupid? It was just his luck that his newest infatuation was Chris’s boyfriend. He wonders how long they’ve been together and what it would be like if he had stumbled upon Yuuri Katsuki earlier and gotten to him before Chris had.

Viktor immediately shakes his head, berating himself. How could he even think that?

Still...

He wonders how long Yuuri Katsuki would last and how soon Chris would get over him and toss him aside. He wonders how weird it would be to go for him then. He’s never tried to go for one of Chris’ ex-boyfriends before, and it’s crazy that he’s thinking about it now for someone he’s just met and someone he barely knows. He’s pretty sure that dating one of your friend’s exes is a big no-no but maybe Chris wouldn’t mind? Chris had never been too attached to his past lovers anyway so—

“Viktor!”

He jolts and he turns towards Chris. His breath catches in his throat when he sees that Yuuri’s stripped down to just his boxers and that ugly fucking tie. 

“Start the music!” Chris yells before he turns back to face Yuuri.

Viktor can barely stand it when he sees Chris pull Yuuri closer towards him and murmur something in his ear. It’s stupid, how absolutely jealous he feels and Viktor does his best to push his irrational jealousy to the back of his head. 

Yuuri isn’t his, he was never his. He doesn’t have the right to feel like this towards his friend’s boyfriend. How could he even entertain thoughts of going after Yuuri after he and Chris hypothetically break up? They’re still together and what if Yuuri ends up being the one for Chris? He won’t be surprised, what with how amazing Yuuri is.

Viktor mechanically goes over to Chris’s stereo and plugs in his phone. He’s dimly aware of Chris announcing something to his guests as he scrolls through his music to look for the one Chris made him download earlier.

He presses play and looks up just as Chris thrusts his ass back to the audience. Viktor snickers and shakes his head slightly. Chris is absolutely shameless. For a moment, Viktor forgets about Yuuri as he cheers and hoots for Chris with the rest of their friends.

Of course, eventually, his eyes are drawn back to Yuuri. He’s standing beside the pole with his hip cocked and a dashing smirk on his pretty pink lips. Yuuri is staring right at him and Viktor’s eyes widen. 

Yuuri's eyes are half-lidded, teasing with a promise of something sensual and Viktor wants nothing more than to take that promise.

Yuuri’s smirk widens when he sees Viktor looking at him and he reaches over to tap Chris slightly. Chris drops down into an inverted split and Yuuri hoists himself up the pole gracefully with his arms. Viktor can’t help but run his eyes through Yuuri’s defined arms, his cute stomach, and his thick thighs. He can’t help but imagine those thighs around his waist and those arms—his eyes snap back up to Yuuri’s face guiltily as if his friend’s boyfriend could sense the dirty thoughts he’s having about him.

Yuuri is standing on top of Chris’ thighs, his own body tight as he holds himself up. When Viktor’s eyes meet his, Yuuri winks and then seductively licks his lips. Viktor’s lips part, his face flushing. He’s dimly aware of the audience cheering and whistling appreciatively at Yuuri.

Chris pulls away from the pole and leaves Yuuri to it. Yuuri’s gaze leaves him and Viktor isn’t sure if he’s relieved or disappointed. He swallows and watches as Yuuri starts to display feats of strength, confidence, and flexibility. Viktor realizes that he’s starting to get dizzy with the alcohol and lust in his veins.

All too soon, Chris comes back to the pole. Viktor watches as they share it easily, their bodies meeting and drawing apart. Viktor’s mature enough to admit that they look good together and that they’re obviously comfortable with each other’s bodies in a way that speaks of long hours together. He watches as Yuuri grips Chris’ back and carries his weight.

Finally, the two of them slide down the pole.

Viktor ignores the ache in his heart as they grin in each other. When Chris grabs Yuuri’s tie and pulls him up into a kiss, Viktor looks away. 

Stupid, he thinks to himself. He’s not yours. Get over yourself. 

Viktor resigns himself to the fact that he’ll probably see more of Chris and Yuuri touching until Chris eventually—inevitably, gets tired of Yuuri.

Viktor looks up just as Chris pushes Yuuri towards him and Viktor automatically reaches out to catch him. Yuuri throws up his arms around his neck and gives him a seductive, tempting grin as he presses his half-naked body against Viktor’s. Viktor hears Chris laugh but his eyes are locked into pretty brown and he can’t look away.

“My family has a Japanese restaurant, Chris knows where it is. You should come by and visit me!” Yuuri slurs as he starts to rock his body and grind against him and Viktor blushes. His mind races to think of unsexy things but it's not enough and he curses at his rising boner.

Yuuri blinks up at him and his eyes are much blearier than they were earlier. His eyelashes flutter and Viktor has a moment to be thankful that he’s holding on to Yuuri before the younger man slumps over, his eyes falling closed.

“Chris??” He chokes out and looks at his friend. Chris looks up at them and straightens up before he leans over to peer thoughtfully at Yuuri’s flushed face. He smiles fondly and pats Yuuri’s cheek before he straightens up.

“Look, Victor, can you do me a favor?” Chris asks and he sounds slightly distracted as he thumbs through his phone. “I have something to deal with, can you bring Yuuri home after the party ends? He lives on the way to you, I’m sure his address is in his wallet or something.”

Viktor gives him a panicked look. What? Man, Viktor knows Chris can be a shitty boyfriend sometimes but he can’t believe that Chris would actually abandon Yuuri. Viktor looks down at Yuuri and feels a pang of longing, a little voice in his mind whispering that he can treat Yuuri so much better and he shakes his head.

He mentally hits himself for thinking badly of Chris. Chris is a distracted, fickle lover, but honestly, Viktor isn’t much better. Who’s he to say that he’ll actually treat Yuuri better? He’s selfish, self-centered and just as easily bored as Chris.

Viktor stares at the top of Yuuri’s head and wonders what he’s going to do with him. He can carry him into his car but Viktor has to sober up first, maybe drink a few glasses of water. He has to find out Yuuri’s address also. Chris had mentioned Yuuri’s wallet. 

Viktor looks up to the pole, flashes of Yuuri dancing on it running through his mind before he finally spots the pile of clothes discarded near it. It was most likely Yuuri’s since Chris had gotten his clothes already.

He drags Yuuri over to a chair and sets him down on it gently. Yuuri’s head lols back to the back of the chair and his mouth parts. He looks so much younger than he really is, and Viktor can't help but smile at the sight he makes.

Viktor heads over to the pole and bends down. He picks up Yuuri’s pants and he feels the lump in the pocket. He pulls out a wallet and opens it to see Yuuri’s driver’s license. He sighs in relief. Yuuri does live on the way. 

Viktor pockets Yuuri’s wallet and grabs Yuuri’s clothes quickly before he makes his way back to Yuuri. Yuuri’s eyes are open, and he’s looking around in obvious confusion. When he sees Viktor, he smiles, wide and open.

Viktor’s jaw tightens. “Here,” he says curtly and holds out Yuuri’s clothes. Yuuri stares at them with blank eyes before they brighten up and he looks up again at Viktor.

“Help me,” he pouts.

Viktor’s jaw twitches at the thought of touching Yuuri’s naked skin and helping him into clothes but he doesn’t say anything and just nods. Yuuri pushes up from his seat and sways slightly before he reaches out and holds on to Viktor’s shoulder.

The spot on his shoulder that Yuuri's holding on to feels impossibly warm and Viktor avoids Yuuri’s gaze as he holds up Yuuri’s pants. Yuuri steps into his pants and fumbles helplessly at the zips and buttons. Viktor hesitates for a moment before he finally reaches over and bats Yuuri's hands away to do it himself.

Yuuri snickers. Viktor looks up, and Yuuri sends him a charming, lopsided smile. Viktor’s heart skips a beat before he shakes his head and straightens up. He helps Yuuri put his arms through his white button-down, and just as Viktor’s about to start buttoning it up, Yuuri’s hand suddenly smacks onto his.

He looks up in confusion and sees the odd look on Yuuri’s face. He frowns and tilts his head in a query.

“I need to throw up,” he whispers and Viktor blanches. He looks at the screen door opening up into Chris’ tiny garden and grabs Yuuri’s waist. He drags him towards it and hastily shoves it open. 

Yuuri rips himself away from Viktor’s grip and stumbles to his knees. He bends over beside Chris’s bushes and retches, throwing up into them. 

Viktor is frozen and he stares at him before he quickly rushes over and kneels down beside the Japanese man. He hesitates for a moment before he carefully puts his hand on Yuuri’s back and starts to soothingly rub. Viktor feels much more sober now and he wrinkles his nose.

Yuuri whimpers and throws up again. Viktor can’t help but make soft cooing sounds in an effort to make him feel better.

“Viktor!” Viktor straightens up and turns his head to see Chris with another man. He motions towards Yuuri and quickly, Chris is beside him.

“Yuuri, baby,” Chris says softly and places a hand on Yuuri’s shoulder. Viktor stares at it. Yuuri groans miserably before he leans in closer towards Viktor. He automatically wraps his arm around Yuuri’s shoulder and gently rubs it.

“If it’s not a hassle for you,” Chris says carefully, “you should bring him home already.” Viktor looks up at them and gives him a bland look that hopefully conveys how irritated he is with Chris. Chris winces apologetically.

“Oh!” Chris blurts out before Viktor can reply. “This is Francis by the way, the one I was talking about. Francis, this is Victor,” he says and beams before he turns to smile at Francis. 

Francis smiles at Viktor and extends his hand towards him. Viktor takes it and smiles back. The one Chris was talking about? Viktor doesn’t remember. Chris probably mentioned him before, but Viktor’s memory is admittedly bad so he quickly lets it go.

“It’s nice to meet you, Francis,” he says as he stands up and carries Yuuri with him. Yuuri mumbles something inaudible and he presses closer to Victor, nuzzling his head on Viktor’s chest and once again, Viktor’s chest hurts. 

Chris reaches over to pat Yuuri’s head. He smiles at Viktor, and really, Viktor can’t be mad at him when Chris is looking at him like that. 

“Is it okay if you bring him home?” Chris asks. 

Viktor looks down at Yuuri before he nods. “I was planning to go home anyway,” he says shortly. “Early day tomorrow.” It’s true, he does have a meeting early in the morning. But really, he just wants to lick his wounds in peace.

“Thank you.” Chris nods.

“Dasvidanya,” he says smoothly before he nods at both Francis and Chris. He bends down and places an arm underneath Yuuri’s knees to lift him up bridal style. It will be easier to bring him into his car this way instead of having to deal with Yuuri trying to drunkenly walk.

Viktor nods his goodbyes at the rest of the people in Chris’s party and thankfully, Chris left his door open. He slips through it slowly as he tries to keep Yuuri from hitting the frame. Yuuri is still in his arms, breathing slowly. Viktor sighs.

He manages to get Yuuri into his car without incident, only having to grip onto Yuuri tightly so he can unlock his car. He goes into the driver’s seat and lets out a long sigh. It’s a good thing that Yuri went home with Georgi, Viktor doesn’t think he can deal with both Yuri and Yuuri right now.

He looks over at the sleeping Yuuri, and he can’t help but admire the way moonlight bathes his face and makes it softer. He shakes his head and turns forward to drive.

It’s silent, the only thing he hears is his own thoughts and occasionally, Yuuri’s soft breathing.

Eventually, he pulls up to Yuuri’s apartment.

"Hey," Yuuri slurs. Viktor jolts in surprise. He didn’t notice that Yuuri was awake already. He turns to face him, a fake smile ready on his lips.

That’s a mistake. Yuuri had leaned over, hand planted in between them. His eyes are half-lidded and his pupils are blown wide as they search Viktor's face. His pretty pink mouth parts slightly, and Viktor’s smile falls and his throat dries as Yuuri licks his lips. It glistens dully in the dim light from the streetlamp. 

Knowing how the other man had just thrown up, Viktor shouldn't be wanting to kiss him as much as he does now. Yuuri’s cheeks are flushed with alcohol and something else, and Viktor nervously swallows. Yuuri Katsuki is simply temptation personified at this moment, an embodiment of sex and desire. Viktor feels the familiar burn of want once more and he shoves it down in embarrassment with a mental image of Chris.

"Bring me up to my apartment," Yuuri murmurs. Viktor's nodding in agreement before he can really think about it. Yuuri dazedly pushes away from Viktor. He off-balances and slumps against the car door with a groan. 

Viktor sighs and undoes his seatbelt. He couldn’t have refused to help his best friend’s boyfriend anyway, Yuuri didn’t look like he could stand, much less walk by himself.

“Wait,” he instructs the drunk man and unlocks the door on his side. He opens it and steps out into the crisp night air. He makes his way to the other side of the car and opens the door. Yuuri tilts towards him and Viktor reaches out automatically to steady the other man, thankful for the seatbelt on Yuuri that’s keeping him from falling.

“Sorry,” Yuuri mumbles and gropes around his side for the seatbelt. Viktor reaches over and unlocks it for him and Yuuri falls the last few inches into Viktor’s stomach. Yuuri rubs his face into Viktor’s shirt and lets out a groan. Viktor sighs. He bends down to wrap his arms around Yuuri’s waist, dragging him out gently and Yuuri stumbles as his feet leave the car.

“Here,” Viktor murmurs and hoists Yuuri’s arm up around his shoulders. He grabs onto that hand and wraps his other arm around Yuuri’s waist. Slowly, they make their way to the elevator and Viktor presses on the button. It opens up and the two of them walk inside.

“What floor are you?” he asks and Yuuri looks up at him. His eyes are still bleary but Viktor notes in slight relief that he looks a little soberer than awhile ago.

“Second,” Yuuri mumbles and Viktor nods as he presses the button for the second floor. Yuuri leans on to him and Viktor stiffly looks ahead. He’s afraid that the more he looks at Yuuri, the more he’ll want. There’s just enough alcohol in him that Viktor is finding it hard to control himself.

The door opens and Yuuri wobbles forward. At least he can walk by himself now, even if he is tilting dangerously. Viktor sighs and catches up to him to place a steadying hand on Yuuri’s arm. They walk silently until they reach a door and Yuuri reaches into his pocket.

He looks down and frowns, patting all his pockets until Viktor remembers that he still has Yuuri’s wallet in his jacket. Viktor pulls it out and hands it to Yuuri and the other man pulls out a keycard. Yuuri slips it in and it clicks open.

Viktor backs away. Surely Yuuri can handle himself now.

Yuuri takes a few steps inside and then looks back at him with a frown. “Aren’t you coming in?” he asks and Viktor blinks in surprise. “So I can thank you,” Yuuri continues and smirks at him.

Viktor should go. He knows he can’t trust himself to be alone with Yuuri right now, not with the heated tension surrounding both of them. 

He follows Yuuri inside.

Yuuri watches him with dark eyes and Viktor numbly closes the door behind him. The light from outside disappears immediately, and the two of them are surrounded in darkness.

Before Viktor knows what’s happening, he feels Yuuri take a few steps and close the distance between them. His breath hitches as he feels Yuuri press him against the door and the feel of Yuuri’s hands settling on his waist.

Uncontrollably, he feels his cock start to harden in his pants as Yuuri drops his head down to nuzzle at the juncture of his neck and shoulder.

“Yuuri,” he says, voice shaky. Yuuri hums in response and Viktor gasps when he feels a light kiss on the bottom of his neck. “No, we should stop,” Viktor says faintly but he knows that his voice doesn’t sound convincing. He doesn’t want to stop.

He feels Yuuri’s hands slide up under his shirt and Viktor groans at the feel of warm hands on his skin, drawing lines up and down his sides. Yuuri kisses up his neck and presses closer towards Viktor. He squeezes his eyes shut at the feeling of Yuuri’s own hardness pressing against his.

He lets out a moan, tilting his head to the side to give Yuuri more access. Yuuri hums in approval before he starts to nip and lick at Viktor's neck with more fervor. Viktor closes his eyes at how good it feels but when he feels Yuuri press their lips together, his eyes shoot open.

He gasps, and Yuuri takes the chance to slip his hot, wet tongue inside. Viktor’s hand comes up to grab onto the back of Yuuri’s shirt, and he shifts his leg until it's in between Yuuri's. Yuuri whimpers beautifully into his mouth as Viktor's leg presses against his erection.

Viktor’s grip tightens on his shirt and he knows that he should pull Yuuri off away from him but then the other man starts to ride and hump his leg, soft moans spilling out from his lips and Viktor is gone. He closes his eyes and his hand comes up to tangle into Yuuri’s hair to angle his head better just as Yuuri’s hands slip up his back and scratch. Viktor kisses back feverishly, barely aware of what he’s doing and who exactly he’s kissing.

Yuuri’s hands disappear from his back and then start to unbutton Viktor’s pants and Viktor is hit with a pang of guilt and shame at the unbidden reminder that is his friend’s boyfriend. What is he doing?

Yuuri pulls away with a gasp and Viktor opens his eyes. Again, he finds himself staring deep into brown eyes dark with desire and lust and Viktor can’t bring himself to push Yuuri away.

Yuuri drops down to his knees, his eyes never leaving Viktor’s and Viktor groans at the sight. He’s not going to deny that he hasn’t fantasized about Yuuri on his knees for him but actually seeing it is too much. For a moment, he wishes that the lights are on so that he can see Yuuri clearer.

Yuuri’s hands reach up and start pushing his pants and his boxers down, his eyes never leaving Viktor's. Viktor should stop him but his hands remain stubborn at his side, his gaze set on the naked desire on Yuuri's face. Yuuri breaks his gaze and he pulls out Viktor’s dick before he quickly looks up again to send Viktor a sinful smirk. He opens his mouth and Viktor moans loudly at the feel of wet heat and the sight of his cock disappearing past Yuuri’s bruised red lips.

Yuuri’s head bobs in between his legs and Viktor is transfixed by the sight of his mouth stretched around his cock. So beautiful. Yuuri’s tongue is skillful and Viktor can’t help the small groans coming out of his own lips.

“Yuuri,” he gasps and his hands finally come up to grasp Yuuri’s hair again as Yuuri’s hand comes up to stroke the parts of Viktor’s dick that his mouth can’t reach. He should pull Yuuri’s head away. Making out and dry humping is one thing, but a blowjob is another. He pulls Yuuri’s hair slightly but all it does is make Yuuri’s eyes fall closed and a shuddering moan to be released from his mouth around Viktor's cock.

The thoughts quickly disappear from his mind when Yuuri pulls away and looks up at him with half-lidded eyes full of pleasure.

“Fuck my mouth,” Yuuri breathes out and fuck, how can Viktor resist that? His grip tightens on Yuuri’s hair and the other man gasps loudly in pleasure, his mouth falling open. He sticks out his tongue and looks up at Viktor expectantly. Viktor groans before he slips his cock back into Yuuri’s irresistible mouth.

He’s already too far gone and he thrusts into warm wetness. He feels the head of his cock bump against the back of Yuuri’s throat and his eyes flutter in an effort to stay open and keep his eyes on Yuuri.

Yuuri is still looking up at him and there are tears in his eyes but Viktor can still see the pleasure in his gaze. There’s a motion below him and Viktor looks. He realizes that Yuuri is jerking himself off and it’s too much, the sight of it is too hot and Viktor’s grip clenches on Yuuri’s hair before he comes.

He groans, his eyes finally slipping closed but they quickly fly open when Yuuri pulls away and starts to lick his dick clean with broad swipes of his tongues. Viktor gapes at the sight and he feels his dick twitch again in interest as Yuuri pulls away and licks his fingers.

Yuuri drops down contentedly to sit on his feet and smiles at him. “Out of all places, I didn’t think I’d see you again at Chris’ birthday,” he rasps out, voice throaty and raw and Viktor freezes.

He stares down at Yuuri in horror. Chris. Fuck.

Viktor reaches behind him shakily to open the door. Fuck. He fucked up. The door opens and light once again spills past the door.

“Viktor?” Chris’s boyfriend asks worriedly and Viktor’s breath hitches as he can finally see Yuuri’s face clearly. He stares at Yuuri’s wide eyes and his red, swollen lips and he knows that he can never look Chris in the eye again. He stumbles out the doorway, hands gripping his pants to pull them up hurriedly.

He doesn’t wait for Yuuri to say something again before he slams the door closed. Quickly, he buttons his pants and rushes to the elevator. He can feel his heart thud loudly in his ears and the guilt and shame finally catch up to him to drive the post-orgasm haze away.

Fuck.  
  



	2. Chapter 2

February 18

_ Riiiiiing! Riiiiiing! _

Chris grunts, burying his face deeper into his soft pillow. If he ignores it, maybe it will stop by itself.

_ Riiiiiing! Riiiiiing! _

Chris groans. Blindly, he reaches out in a vain effort to find his phone. It’s too loud, and Chris is too hungover for a call so early in the morning. He’d like to know whose idea it is to call him at God knows what time.

Finally, his blind grappling rewards him with his vibrating phone and Chris hurriedly puts it up to his ear. He squints in the morning light, wincing and irritated.

“What?” he snaps into his phone. He instantly feels bad when he hears a familiar, embarrassed squeak on the other end. Chris groans and rolls onto his back, his other hand covering his eyes from the horrid light of the sun.

“Yuuri, sorry,” he mumbles. He can’t help but smack his lips slightly at how dry his mouth feels. Fuck, he wants water. “Why are you calling so early? I was sleeping.”

“Chris...It’s 1 in the afternoon.”

“Oh,” Chris replies. He blinks furiously in an effort to get rid of his grogginess and rubs his eyes. “Sorry,” he repeats sheepishly.

Yuuri gives him a delicate, hesitant laugh in reply. 

“I’m sorry for disturbing you, I just, well...” Yuuri trails off and Chris hums encouragingly. Sometimes it takes a while for Yuuri to say things, and Chris is sleepy enough that he doesn’t really mind yet. He can feel himself start drifting off to sleep again, his eyes slowly closing.

“What happened last night?” Yuuri finally blurts out, loud and rushed.

Chris’s eyes shoot open. He looks up at the ceiling and rubs his face.

“What do you mean?” Chris carefully asks. Yuuri groans in embarrassment. Chris can practically see Yuuri curling up somewhere, hiding his face behind his hands. He’s seen it more than enough times during class.

“Someone posted pictures!” Yuuri cries out in distress. “Pictures of me in my boxers and us pole dancing together and—and, me  _ dancing  _ with Viktor Nikiforov and that—that other Yuri!”

Chris really can’t help it. He laughs. Yuuri stops mid-spiral, and he groans again, this time louder. He sounds absolutely anguished. If Chris was there, he’d be patting Yuuri’s head right now in sympathy. All he can do now, though, is giggle and relax into his sheets.

“Aww, it seems like you already know, babe. I did hear you had a dance battle with Yuri—you won, so be proud. And you  _ did  _ also mention last night that you danced with Viktor too,” Chris says in amusement.

Yuuri whimpers.

“I asked if you wanted to dance the routine we’ve been practicing, and you agreed pretty easily, so,” Chris continues, maybe a little unsympathetically.

“I was drunk!” Yuuri moans. “Oh my god, I can’t believe I stripped and pole danced in front of all your friends.” 

Chris laughs again, and fondly, he shakes his head. 

“It’s okay,” he soothes, checking his nails. Surprisingly still fine. “You were great last night. My friends loved you. I think Viktor practically orgasmed when you started to grind on him.”

“When I started to  _ WHAT??? _ ” Yuuri shrieks. 

Chris winces and he pulls the phone away from his ear. A headache starts to throb behind his forehead, insistent and loud, and Chris’s features pinch.

“You grinded on one of my best friends,” Chris explains and ignores the  _ Oh my God! _ that comes out of his phone in reply, “and you kind of threw up on him also, I think. Or on his shoes, at least. He brought you home after that.”

There’s silence on the other end for a good few seconds. Chris frowns, pulling his phone away from his ear just to check he didn’t accidentally hang up on Yuuri.

“Yuuri?” he carefully prods. Yuuri whimpers pathetically in reply. He hears Yuuri mumble something that sounds suspiciously like  _ “I can’t believe I threw up on Viktor Nikiforov!” _ but really, Chris can’t be sure.

“It’s not  _ that _ bad,” Chris teases gently. “Just apologize to Viktor, he’s no stranger to people throwing up on him. Hell, he's had to deal with me like that plenty of times already.”

“How?” Yuuri moans. “I can’t—I don’t think I can look him in the eye anytime soon, Chris! I’m so  _ embarrassed _ . I’m a horrible, wild, blackout drunk. I just want to disappear.”

Chris hums thoughtfully and purses his lips. “I can give you his number,” he says casually and on the other end, Yuuri’s breath hitches.

“I...Okay, I think that would be okay.” Yuuri softly replies. His voice is so faint that Chris can hardly hear it through his phone. 

“Don’t worry about it too much,” Chris murmurs, low and comforting. “I’ll call you back later, okay? I’ll text you Viktor’s number.”

“Okay…” Yuuri mumbles. “Sorry for waking you up, Chris. Happy birthday again, I hope you had a great night. Tell Francis I said hi also, please.”

“Will do.”

“Bye, Chris.”

“Bye, babe.”

Chris sighs in relief once Yuuri hangs up, and he hastily twists his upper body to put his phone back on the nightstand. He turns around and meets Francis’ curious gaze.

“You’re awake. Good morning, baby.” Chris beams, ignoring the headache pounding at his temples. “Yuuri says hi.”

“I heard,” Francis replies. His head is pillowed on his arm, his eyes half-lidded with sleep. “He doesn’t remember anything?”

“Don’t think so.” Chris shrugs.

Francis gives him a suggestive smile, reaching out to place a warm hand on Chris’s bare chest. Chris smiles back, already feeling arousal hit him low in his belly. Francis makes to pull him closer, but Chris holds out a hand, biting down on his lip.

He should give Viktor’s number to Yuuri now, just in case he forgets later. He should probably give Viktor a heads up too and thank him again for taking care of Yuuri. Chris nods to himself and gives a sheepish, apologetic smile to Francis before he turns back to his bedside table to grab his phone.

“Sorry, lemme just...”

He sends out a quick text to Yuuri with Viktor’s number and then texts Viktor to let him know about Yuuri. All the while, Francis is stroking down his chest, up and down motions that just manage to stir him up.

Chris tosses his phone to the side and grins. He throws his leg over Francis’s waist, straddling him easily.

“Okay, I’m done.”

“Finally.” Francis pulls him down and smiles against his mouth.

*

Later, when Chris is preparing to sleep and browsing through Facebook, he gets a notification.

People are liking and commenting on photos that he’s tagged in, and so Chris presses on it.

When the page loads, he smirks at the photos from last night of him and Yuuri on the pole. At the corner of his eye, he sees another notification pop up.

Viktor Nikiforov likes a photo you are tagged in.

_ 1 minute ago _

He clicks on it, and—huh. He’s brought to one of the pictures from the exact same set that he’s already looking at. His eyebrows raise in surprise as it sinks in which picture Viktor just liked. Although Chris is also tagged in the picture, he’s very much not the center and the focus of it. He’s in the picture, yes, with his thighs wide open during the Jade Split, but this is clearly a picture of Yuuri.

Yuuri, standing on his thighs and holding on to the pole with one hand. Yuuri, staring at the camera, his gaze seductive and intense. 

It’s a very nice picture, Chris admits, and scrolls down to like it also. He pauses and tilts his head curiously at his phone. The likes should say that Viktor’s liked it also, but Viktor’s name is gone, almost as if he had unliked the photo.

Chris scoffs and really, he’s glad he caught Viktor liking the photo before Viktor had unliked it.

He switches apps to go to his messages and goes to Viktor’s name. He’s about to send a teasing text when he notices that Viktor still hasn’t replied to his messages from this morning. Chris pouts.

Chris G  
  
r u mad? (Crying Face)  
  
sorry about leaving u to deal w yuuri  
  
i'll make it up to u (Kissing Face With Closed Eyes)

Viktor usually replies right away. Chris knows that Viktor always has his phone on him.

He puts aside the mystery of Viktor’s missing like for a while and sends Viktor a few more texts. He doesn’t even care that he’s quadruple texting. He’s gotten over that shame long, long ago.

Chris goes to bed with a feeling of unease, festering in his gut. He sets it aside and shakes his head. Maybe Viktor will reply to him tomorrow.

Sunday, February 19

Chris stretches out his limbs on the floor of the pole studio, breathing out steadily as he tries to push his body further. He hardly feels the burn in his thighs anymore when he goes into a split and he happily hums. He folds his upper body down towards his right leg and relaxes into the stretch, sinking deep into it.

He’s waiting for Yuuri to arrive from his other dance class, ballroom or something like that. Chris doesn’t bother asking Yuuri to warm up or stretch before their sessions anymore, he’s already limber enough from his previous class.

Pole dancing is the only kind of dancing that Chris does—unless, of course, you count the bumpin’ and grindin’ in dark nightclubs, because Chris does that pretty well too. Hell, he  _ owns  _ several nightclubs. 

Yuuri, however, is a dancer through and through. Ballroom, ballet, hip hop—Yuuri is classically trained. Chris knows he’s learning other genres too, although he doesn’t quite know how many.

Chris also knows that despite Yuuri’s innate talent for dance, he's also still so shy and nervous. He performs well in practice with the people he’s comfortable with—Chris is exceedingly pleased that he's counted as one of those people already—but once you put him on stage, Yuuri...becomes afraid. He still performs well, per se, but Chris  _ knows  _ he can do so much better.

It's why Chris decided to take Yuuri under his wing. 

The only reason why Yuuri even attended his first pole dancing class was because Phichit dragged him to it. Yuuri had obviously been uncomfortable, but even Chris could see the strength in his core and in his thighs and the obvious grace in his movements. Pole dancing is primarily dependent on core and upper body strength, but it doesn’t hurt that Yuuri's legs and abs are tight and well-muscled. Even then, Chris had seen the potential Yuuri had if he could only relax a little bit.

He was surprised, to say the least, when Yuuri went to the next class only a few days later. And then Yuuri just kept going and showing up in the pole studio. 

The day that Yuuri came to class without Pitchit, he was so obviously nervous that Chris just had to stick with him and help make him more comfortable. When Francis—he was just Chris’s hot pole dancing instructor then, they weren’t together yet—announced a pole dancing performance in April as a way to culminate their lessons, Yuuri looked like he was on the verge of passing out. Chris carefully invited Yuuri to a private pole dancing practice session and thankfully, Yuuri had agreed. It was maybe then that Chris grew a soft spot for the man only two years younger than him. He'd never admit it, but Chris had this overwhelming urge to take care of Yuuri and baby him.

So when Yuuri comes into the studio looking visibly upset, Chris is more than a little worried. Yuuri is quiet as he drops his bag on the shelf near the door.

“I’m just going to change, Chris,” Yuuri mumbles, his head bowed low and his shoulders curled defensively.

Chris frowns. He raises his upper body so he can look at Yuuri properly, but Yuuri doesn’t even meet his gaze, just drags his feet into the small changing room at the corner of the studio. He closes the door behind him with a  _ click _ .

Chris stands up and makes his way to the door. He leans to the side of it and waits for Yuuri to come out. Better to deal with it now instead of Yuuri being distracted by it the whole time and messing up his spins and grips.

It takes a while, but finally, Yuuri opens the door with his head bowed low and a sad twist on his lips.

“Yuuuuuuri,” Chris draws out.

Yuuri jumps in surprise with a gasp, and his gaze flies up to Chris’s.

“What’s wrong? You look upset.” 

Yuuri looks away, slow enough for Chris to see the beginnings of tears in his eyes.

“Hey,” Chris says in surprise, automatically reaching out to Yuuri. Yuuri shakes his head and bats Chris’s hand away.

“I don’t want to talk about it,” Yuuri stiffly and insistently replies. He pushes past Chris to stand beside the pole near the center of the room. 

Chris is stunned. He’s seen Yuuri upset before, but never like this. He follows Yuuri and stands in front of him and the pole. The other man still isn’t meeting his gaze, choosing instead to stare resolutely at Chris’s knees.

Chris sighs and places his hands on his hips. He’s concerned, but Chris has never been the type to push. He especially doesn’t want to push Yuuri.

“Okay, so you’re pretty strong on the poses where you use mainly your thighs. Your upper body strength isn't quite strong enough to hold other moves or get up to other moves,” Chris reluctantly begins. “I think your main strength--and something we should capitalize on--is your flexibility and your beautiful spins.”

Yuuri nods and Chris’s lips curl downwards. Yuuri doesn’t even look as if he’s listening. Everything Chris is saying is going in one ear and going out the other. Chris sighs.

“Now, the culminating performance is still 2 months from now so we still have a fair amount of time left, but I was just wondering if you had some music in mind already.” 

Yuuri looks up at that, blinking rapidly. It’s the first time he’s met Chris’s eyes since he arrived. 

“Music?” Yuuri echoes. Chris nods.

“I have to pick,” Yuuri clarifies, his lips twisting.

Chris shrugs. “I mean, it’s better if you do. So you connect more with your music and really  _ feel _ it.”

“You choose all the songs you perform to then?” Yuuri asks, his eyebrows lifting.

Chris smirks. “Of course I do. Why do you think they’re so full of passion and sexual love?” he teases and Yuuri laughs softly. He looks a little less upset compared to earlier. It's enough to make Chris relax a little bit.

“I always just thought that Francis picked them out for you,” Yuuri sheepishly admits, ducking his head.

Chris’s eyes widen at the implication. “Yuuri,” he purrs, leaning in and tilting his head, exposing the line of his neck. “Are you implying that our dance instructor gives me sexual songs to perform so that I’m inspired to perform for him and think of him during my performance?”

“No!” Yuuri squeaks, furiously shaking his hands and his head, his eyes wide. “I’m sorry, I didn’t—”

“Ah, well, he has, sometimes,” Chris admits and winks. 

Yuuri freezes and then drops his hands. He gives Chris a dry, unamused look, and Chris only laughs.

“How about you get back to me in two weeks?” Chris continues, directing the conversation back.

Yuuri shrugs. He bites his lip and wraps his arms around his body, looking thoughtfully to the side. Chris waits.

“Okay,” Yuuri slowly agrees, and Chris smiles.

“Okay,” Chris repeats after him. “Let’s practice that Spinning Stradle, eh? Work on your arms for a bit and see if you can do it." 

Yuuri nods. He reaches out to grip the pole, his face set in determination.

They practice for around an hour, the most that either of them can spare. Their private practice sessions are really just a side thing for both of them since Yuuri’s still studying and just about to graduate from college, while Chris is busy managing his chain of nightclubs.

At the end of their session, Yuuri looks considerably more okay. He’s sweating, but he’s smiling, so Chris feels a little more confident in pushing the matter again.

“What was bothering you awhile ago?” He carefully asks, and Yuuri stiffens. He bites his lip and rubs the back of his head as he looks away.

“I don’t know,” Yuuri says uncertainly. “It’s nothing. I just texted Viktor to apologize and he gave me this really weird reply and I don’t know what I did wrong.”

Chris blinks. He didn’t think it was going to be about Viktor, but considering what happened two nights ago, maybe he should have seen it coming.

Chris goes to the shelves where both their bags are and Yuuri follows him. He takes out his phone and checks his messages. His eyebrows furrow when he sees that Viktor still hasn’t replied to him. Sighing, he sends another text to Viktor that he’ll hopefully reply to this time.

“What did he says?” Chris asks as he turns to face Yuuri.

“He said he’s not the only one I should be apologizing to,” Yuuri murmurs. He closes his eyes and releases a rough breath. 

At that, Chris frowns. He looks back at his phone. That was pretty rude, and it’s odd that Viktor replied to Yuuri and not to him.

“He didn’t even use like, any emojis or emoticons and he was using  _ periods  _ and proper capitalization and everything! I think he’s mad at me, Chris.” Yuuri whines.

“Can I see?” Chris asks before he can help himself. Yuuri blushes, but he reaches into his black Mizuno bag anyway to get his phone. He unlocks it and goes to the messaging app, scrolling down until it looks like he finds what he's looking for. Wordlessly, he passes Chris his phone. 

Viktor  
  
Hey!! This is Yuuri from last night. I’m really sorry about last night and how I behaved, i'm usually not like that, I swear!!!!! Thank you for bringing me home though  
  
It's fine. I'm not the only one you should be apologizing to.  
  
Oh... Alright. Sorry again.

“Huh.”

Yuuri takes his silence as a bad thing, and he groans before he covers his face with both hands. “He hates me,” he states as if it’s a fact and Chris immediately shakes his head. 

“No, no. He just talks like this to people he doesn’t really know. He’s a big fan of emojis when you get to know him,” he assures.

“What does he mean though? What else did I do that night? Did I offend anyone else?” Yuuri asks. 

Chris hums, his gaze flicking up the ceiling. He taps his lip and thinks back on what he knows and remembers from last night. Yuuri  _ did  _ have that dance battle with the Russian Yuri and totally embarrassed him. That must be it. 

Chris nods to himself. It’s plausible, Yuri is Viktor’s cousin. Chris knows how protective Viktor is even if he teases Yuri and gives him shit all the time.

“You  _ did  _ totally embarrass the little Yuri in a dance-off,” Chris offers and Yuuri nods at that. "Great moves, by the way," Chris adds with a wink and Yuuri laughs, ducking his head.

“That makes sense. They’re close, right? Aren't they cousins?” Yuuri says, so quietly that Chris figures he’s talking to himself. Chris doesn't say anything in reply and just watches him.

“Okay,” Yuuri says decisively, straightening up, “I’ll go apologize to Yuri then.” He sounds like he’s dreading it. Chris can’t help but giggle.

*

“Are you still messed up about the pig?” 

Viktor looks up. Yuri’s tone is spiteful, and when their gazes meet, Yuri rolls his eyes. Viktor smiles at his cousin, a little too wide, a little too fake.

“Don’t test me, Yurachka,” Viktor cheerfully says.

Yuri glares at him, his lips twisting into a scowl. “He apologized to me, you know.” Yuri grumbles, crossing his arms, but Viktor spots the small smile on his lips. His eyebrows draw together and he frowns.

“Yuuri?” Viktor asks to confirm, and Yuri nods.

“In ballet class a while ago. He said he was sorry for the dance-off and if he embarrassed me during Chris’s birthday.”

“Huh,” Viktor says.

Yuri peers at him through his blonde hair, leaning in closer towards him. The table in between them is large and Yuri is so small, but he somehow manages to make Viktor feel trapped anyway with his next words.

“What’s your problem with him anyway? Do you not approve of him for Chris?” 

Viktor sighs. He doesn’t want to tell Yuri what happened between him and Yuuri. He doesn’t want to say it out loud because it makes it real, makes it something Viktor won’t be able to deny anymore.

“It’s not that,” he says stiffly. He shakes his head with a tight smile. 

Yuri scowls and leans away. Viktor finds he can breathe a little easier, a little less afraid that Yuri will see the dirt and shame he’s hiding behind his smile. Yuri is his cousin, and under Yakov’s tutelage just like him. Viktor doesn’t want the eyes that look up at him with barely disguised admiration to look upon him with disgust and judgment instead. His stomach turns inside his body at the thought.

“They’re always flirting,” Yuri grumbles, and Viktor’s chest feels odd. He swallows down his anger at the thought of Chris and Yuuri. Yuuri with his dark, teasing gaze. Yuuri who holds his best friend’s heart so carelessly. Yuuri with his pink cheeks and wide, brown eyes.

“Chris picks him up from ballet sometimes for ‘private pole dancing practice’. So fucking gross. Private practice, my ass. I’ll bet good money that the pole is Chris dick,” Yuri continues with a sneer and Viktor winces. 

“You’re 15, don’t speak like that,” he half-heartedly scolds. He’s distracted. He can’t help but imagine it now. He’s already seen Chris and Yuuri stripped down to nothing but their boxers. He’s already seen their bodies wrapped around each other on a pole and how good they look together. He’s already seen how Yuuri looks on his knees with a cock in his mouth, and God knows how many times he's accidentally seen Chris's dick.

Viktor finds himself burning with jealousy that he doesn’t have the right to feel. Yuuri isn’t his. It’s fucking stupid that he even has to remind himself that. 

Maybe if Viktor never bumped into Yuuri while dropping off Yuri. Maybe if he never got to see him firsthand and hope and plan to meet Yuuri again, the cute stranger with pretty brown eyes. Maybe if he had never let himself fantasize in the days after their first meeting of asking Yuuri out, of getting to know him more. Maybe if Yuuri had never asked him to dance, never stole his heart in the span of a single song with a tango, a waltz, and a salsa.

Maybe then, Viktor wouldn’t be feeling this ache of want and lost opportunities. He tries to imagine a world where he only meets Yuuri after Chris introduces them. A world where Yuuri is just another notch on Chris’s belt, a world where Viktor would have just thought he was cute, and that was that.

He releases a harsh breath and reaches for his phone to text Chris about lunch plans. His hands shake. He knows his text is a little too formal, a little too devoid of his usual cheer and emojis.

Chris thankfully doesn’t point it out. He simply asks if lunch is at their usual place, and Viktor agrees. The comfort of a familiar place will do him good. It will make it easier for him to tell the truth.

Chris G  
  
Can we meet up for lunch tomorrow?  
  
FINALLY!! usual place? (Smiling Face With Heart-Shaped Eyes)  
  
yes.

He watches Yuri shovel in his food as if he hasn’t eaten for days. Viktor tries to let go of the dread building up inside of him.

Monday, February 20

Viktor goes to the cafe early. He does it in the hope of steeling himself to get ready to tell Chris the truth. He’s nervous. He doesn’t think he's ever been this nervous in his life, even when he came out to his parents. 

He takes in a shaky breath and drops his head on to his hands, closing his eyes. 

He looks up when a figure appears in front of him and pulls out the chair. It’s Chris, and he’s wearing his glasses but it doesn’t hide the brightness in his eyes as Chris smiles down at him. Moved on autopilot, Viktor stands up and greets him with a chaste press of their cheeks.

Not yet, Viktor tells himself as Chris sits down across him.

Not yet, Viktor tells himself as they both order a cup of coffee. Chris, with his fancy drink full of sugar and God knows what and Viktor, with his simple cup.

Not yet, Viktor tells himself when they both start chatting about their day. Viktor, with his short replies, and Chris with an increasingly annoyed tone as Viktor barely talks past one-word answers.

Not yet, Viktor tells himself as he listens silently to Chris ramble on about how nice the food is and how nice the weather is and whatever. He stares blankly into his coffee cup and tries to gather up the courage to tell Chris.

From the corner of his eye, he sees Chris drop his phone in between them, unlocked and on his messages app. He hears an audible sigh. Viktor isn’t looking at Chris, but he knows that Chris is rolling his eyes right now. Viktor can’t see who he’s texting. He doesn’t want to look up to confirm his suspicions, but he can tell that it’s probably Yuuri.

“I was really sad that my darling was late to see me during my birthday,” Chris says airily, almost to himself. Viktor looks up, his jaw tight and his eyes wide. Chris hadn’t brought up Yuuri in his rambling, and now that he is, Viktor should say something. 

How was Yuuri even late to his birthday? Was Yuuri too busy in dance battles and dancing with him to let Chris know he was already there?

As if Chris can tell what Viktor is thinking about, he looks straight at Viktor as he says his next words. “He more than made up for it though, if you know what I mean,” Chris says, and Viktor can’t ignore the suggestion lacing his tone. The over wink Chris sends him seals the deal with what Chris is implying.

Viktor feels the bile in his throat. He feels like he’s about to be sick. Chris’s face scrunches up in worry, opening his mouth to say something, but Viktor isn’t ready for Chris’s worry and concern.

_ Buzz! _

Viktor almost jumps, his nerves shot. Chris’s attention is thankfully diverted away from him, back to his phone, and Viktor relaxes. Relief fills him.

They both look down. Just as quick as it had come, the relief leaves. All Viktor can see is a familiar, toned body, clad in nothing but tiny booty shorts. Viktor only has a few seconds to appreciate the beautiful sight of skin before Chris hastily grabs his phone. Viktor’s eyes track it without even thinking about it.

Viktor can’t deny it anymore, Chris’s messages were open to his chat with Yuuri. Viktor’s mouth dries. He stares in astonishment at the space where Chris’s phone previously was.

He hears Chris snicker. When he looks up, Chris is gleefuly tapping at his phone. It’s undeniable that Yuuri and Chris are together, if the teasing, sensual pic Viktor just saw wasn’t the final clue to prove that he actually did make out with his friend’s boyfriend. 

Viktor made out with his friend’s boyfriend and let him  _ suck his cock.  _

The shame and the horror rises up from inside of him again.

He clears his throat. It’s time to come clean.

“Speaking of Yuuri,” he croaks out uncomfortably.

Chris looks up from his phone and blinks. 

Viktor’s clenches his fists, his coffee cup in between his hands. He can’t quite meet Chris’s earnest green eyes. A few awkward seconds pass by, Chris obviously waiting for him. Viktor is starting to feel exceedingly more and more uncomfortable. Viktor stomps down his urge to flinch when Chris’s eyes widen, a lightbulb turning on behind his gaze. Chris reaches over to pat his hands.

“Viktor!” Chris gasps. Viktor meets his gaze with wide eyes. “It’s okay, you don’t have to say anything! I already know what you’re going to say,” Chris soothes. 

Viktor pales, his breath catching. Of course. Viktor had told Yuuri to apologize to Chris also. Maybe Yuuri wasn’t that bad and actually came clean to Chris.

“You do?” He tries to hide the fear in his tone.

Chris enthusiastically nods, his smile stretching across his face. “Yuuri invited you to his family’s restaurant, didn’t he?” Chris asks, and Viktor’s face slackens. 

Fuck. He actually thought that Chris knew.

“We’re just having coffee now and we haven’t had lunch yet, so I think it would be a great idea if we had lunch there. It’s pretty near, only a few blocks away and I think Yuuri’s shift is in a few minutes.” Chris is practically bouncing in excitement, and Viktor tries not to stare at him in horror. 

He's pretty sure that his face is doing some weird shit right now in an effort to hide the multitude of emotions that he’s feeling.

He can’t see Yuuri right now. Just the thought of Yuuri and the memory of last Saturday gets him hard, Viktor doesn’t know what he’s going to do when he sees Yuuri close up in the flesh. He doesn’t know how he’s going to react, if he’s going to be angry or if the lust will overcome it.

“Let’s go?” Chris asks, a smug smile on his face. 

Viktor automatically stands up, his mind racing. Chris grabs his hand, and Viktor can’t do anything but let himself be led, feeling numb inside.

Viktor is tense all throughout the walk to the restaurant. Chris doesn’t even notice; he’s texting someone on his phone. 

They arrive after a few minutes, and a woman greets them. Chris smiles as he grabs her hand and presses a kiss to it.

“Ah, Mari, you look beautiful as ever,” he says. Viktor looks between the two of them in surprise.

Mari simply rolls her eyes and pulls her hand away before she gently taps Chris’ head with the menu she’s holding.

“I have no time for your flattery,” she drawls. Chris grins. Mari smiles, exasperated yet fond. “Are you looking for Yuuri?” 

Chris laughs. He shrugs, tilting his head slyly. “We’re here to eat actually, but if your brother is here, I wouldn’t mind seeing a pretty face.”

Viktor’s eyes widen. He looks again at Mari with new eyes. This is Yuuri’s sister? He tries to observe her discreetly, noting the way she stands loose and casual, her hair pushed back in a messy headband. She’s pretty, but Viktor thinks that Yuuri is much prettier.

They go inside Yutopia and Mari sits them in a booth near the window. Viktor sits down, his shoulders tight as he looks around for Yuuri. He doesn’t know what he’s going to do when he finally sees Yuuri. He doesn’t know how to act, what to say, what to do.

“Hi, hello, here are your—Chris?”

Viktor’s head snaps up. He stares with wide eyes at Yuuri who’s holding out a menu, another one clasped to his chest. Yuuri is looking back and forth between the two of them, his own eyes just as wide.

“What are you doing here?” Yuuri asks, obviously flustered, a red flush starting to crawl up his neck. Viktor traces the red with his eyes, he can’t help it, before his eyes flick to Chris’s. 

Chris isn't even looking at him, he's smiling charmingly up at Yuuri as he reaches out and gets the menu that Yuuri is holding out.

“My, Yuuri, I just wanted to see you, do I need any more reason than that?” Chris purrs as he drops his head onto his hand. He looks up through his eyelashes, coy and flirtatious, and there’s a teasing smirk on his lips.

“There’s always another reason for you,” Yuuri replies dryly, but there’s a fondness in the way his mouth curves around the words. Chris smiles and then looks at Viktor. 

Viktor swallows nervously, wondering if Chris can see the desire that he's trying to push down.

“You remember my friend Viktor, right?” Chris says. Yuuri’s gaze snaps to him. Viktor meets Yuuri’s eyes and  _ fuck _ , he’d forgotten just how captivating Yuuri’s eyes were. Viktor could get lost in them, and he can’t help but remember how dark and intense they can get, the sordid heat in them. 

“O-Of course,” Yuuri stutters out and blushes under Viktor’s gaze, “How can I forget?” he blurts out. Viktor’s eyes widen. 

Viktor can feel his cheeks heat up at the flattery, and he breaks their gaze to look down at the table.

“Here’s your menu,” Yuuri squeaks out. He drops the menu he was clutching to his chest. Viktor looks up just to see Yuuri scampering away as if the devil is chasing after him. 

In front of him, Chris laughs. “He’s cute, isn’t he?” Chris asks.

Viktor’s jaw tightens. He hums noncommittally and reaches out to get the menu in front of him. He flips through it silently, achingly aware of the curious way Chris is staring at him.

“Yuuri,” Chris calls out. Yuuri is passing through their table, his head ducked and ears red. “What would you recommend?” 

Yuuri perks up. “Oh, um, the katsudon. It’s really good, it’s my favorite.” 

Chris nods and smiles, handing Yuuri back the menu. “I’ll have that then, I trust your judgment.”

Yuuri nods, smiling shyly back. He looks towards Viktor. Not at him directly, Viktor notes, it's as if Yuuri is looking past him in an effort to avoid his gaze.

“What will…What will you have?” Yuuri asks, shifting back and forth on his feet. 

It’s... _ weird _ . Viktor feels a little off-footed at how different Yuuri is. He can’t help but compare how Yuuri was during their first meeting, how he was the night of the Banquet and how he is now. Yuuri Katsuki is an enigma, a multi-faceted man of many surprises, and if Viktor is honest with himself, he wants to know more about him. 

If there’s anything Viktor likes, it’s being surprised.

He clears his throat and stiffly replies, “I’ll have the katsudon also.”

Yuuri nods and coughs before he continues. “Drinks?” he asks.

Chris shakes his head. “Just water,” he replies and Viktor nods his agreement. He hands Yuuri back the menu, his gaze still locked on the other man’s face, and Yuuri silently takes it.

Viktor’s eyes don’t leave Yuuri when he walks away from their table again. He can’t help it, can’t help but stare and observe and catalogue all the differences he can see. The Yuuri now obviously isn’t the same as the pole-dancing sex god last Saturday, but he also isn’t just the shy, blushing man from last week. 

Maybe it’s Chris. Maybe Chris is the reason for the glimpses of something teasing and playful, something light. The two of them are obviously comfortable with each other. The way they move around each and the way they talk to each other speaks a lot about how well they know each other.

Viktor and Chris chat for a bit about mundane topics, but Viktor’s mind is still on Yuuri. Being in close quarters with the other man isn’t good for him. All he can think about are his sordid dreams, and he thinks it shows in how he can’t take his eyes off of Yuuri. 

He doesn’t know if Chris can tell that Viktor isn’t paying 100% attention to him and instead directing all of his attention to his boyfriend. He feels guilty that he’s thinking about Chris’s boyfriend so lewdly while right in front of Chris, so he tries to push away the intrusive thoughts as soon as they come.

Yuuri comes back to give them their food, and Chris thanks him with a flirtatious smile. 

Viktor stares at Yuuri. He wonders if Yuuri is feeling the same guilt and shame as he is, the same apprehension and hesitancy to come clean to Chris. Yuuri is obviously fond of Chris, and Viktor would understand if he doesn’t want to tell Chris the truth and ruin what’s obviously a very good thing between them, especially since they've only been together for such a short time.

Yuuri seems to feel the intensity of his stare during the times he passes by their table. Every time Yuuri looks at him, Yuuri gets more and more flustered, and Viktor gets more and more curious. There's no regret in Yuuri's eyes when he looks at Chris, it's only Viktor that he seems to have trouble meeting eyes with.

Yuuri stops by to refill their water, and Viktor’s eyes narrow as he appraises the other man. He notes the way Yuuri’s hands seem to shake, and from the corner of his eye, he can see Chris open his mouth. Before Chris has a chance to say anything, Yuuri quickly leaves.

When Yuuri is out of earshot, Chris kicks at his leg.

“What are you doing?” Chris grumbles. He glares. Viktor doesn’t think Chris realizes just how protective he is of Yuuri. Viktor had seen it before when he saw Yuuri at Chris’s banquet, when the younger man had tensed at seeing him. Chris had automatically reached out to comfort him then.

Viktor rubs the back of his neck and shrugs, trying to look casual. He’s desperate to make it seem like he’s not as affected by Yuuri as he really is. “He’s so different from your banquet,” he says, instead of the number of things he has in mind of how beautiful Yuuri is and how much Viktor wants him.

Chris laughs. 

“Very different,” he agrees. “Yuuri’s very…” Chris pauses thoughtfully, humming, before he nods. “Soft.” 

It feels incomplete. Soft doesn’t even begin to encompass everything Yuuri is.

“He’s very shy and insecure, and he gets anxious a lot, but you should see him perform, he’s beautiful,” Chris continues, his eyes lighting up in obvious joy. “Sometimes, when he gets on the pole, he’s like a whole different person. He lacks confidence in himself, but he’s also very competitive and he doesn’t like to lose. He gets this challenge in his eyes, and it’s really so interesting,” he continues, looking at Yuuri from across the room. Affection drips out of his words; it’s undeniable how fond he is of Yuuri.

It does nothing to help ease the guilt inside of him. All it does it feed it. He feels consumed.

“You sound very fond of him,” Viktor says simply.

Chris smiles. “I am,” he murmurs in agreement. 

Viktor swallows down the rock in his throat. Suddenly, the delicious pork cutlet bowl tastes like ash. How could he do this? How could he be  _ that _ friend? How could he betray Chris like this? Viktor abruptly places his chopsticks down beside his bowl.

“I don’t feel like eating anymore,” Viktor says thickly. He stands up. “I’m going to talk to Yuuri for a while, okay?”

Chris doesn’t say anything, blinking in surprise. His eyebrows are high up his forehead. 

Viktor takes in a steadying breath and walks away from Chris, across the room to where Yuuri is. He places a gentle hand on Yuuri’s shoulder, and Yuuri jumps in surprise, quickly turning. Viktor is unprepared for the look on Yuuri’s face. 

Yuuri’s lips are parted, practically tempting Viktor to bend down and kiss them, and there’s a look of unrestrained awe in his face.

Viktor’s lips thin. He nods towards the exit of the restaurant, not saying anything. Yuuri frowns, glancing to where Chris is still sitting at the booth. Viktor holds his breath and waits until finally, Yuuri looks back at him. He’s biting his lower lip, unconsciously seductive, before he nods. 

Viktor exhales. He shakily makes his way to the exit, Yuuri trailing behind him silently. Viktor can hear his own heart pounding in his ears.

When they’re finally outside, Viktor turns to face Yuuri. 

Yuuri is looking at him oddly, and he’s worrying his bottom lip with his teeth. Viktor frowns as the other man shuffles his feet and plays with his sleeves.

“Have you apologized to him? Have you even told Chris?” Viktor asks quietly, and Yuuri’s eyes widen. 

Yuuri’s eyebrows draw together and he frowns, dropping his hands to his side. Still now.

“Tell Chris?” Yuuri repeats, an odd lilt in his tone. 

Viktor looks away. “Don’t make me say it,” he says stiffly, and a confused noise comes out of Yuuri’s throat.

“Say what?” Yuuri chokes out.

“I don’t want to tell Chris,” Viktor snaps. He glares at the floor in between them, his teeth gritted painfully. “It’s better if it comes from you instead of me.”

“Tell him what?” Yuuri cries out defensively, and Viktor looks up. 

He gives Yuuri a hard look, his face pinched. How can Yuuri even  _ try _ to deny what happened?

“Don’t play dumb!” Viktor grits out, and it’s louder than he intended it to be, angrier than he thought he was. 

Yuuri takes a step back and stares at him with wide eyes. Viktor can’t bear to look at him.

“I’m going to go,” he says stiffly, looking away. It’s not enough. From the corner of his eye, he sees Yuuri deflate, his body practically curling into itself. “Tell Chris it’s his turn to pay.”

Viktor turns away from Yuuri, ready to walk away when a soft voice calls out to him.

“Are you mad at me?”

Viktor turns back in disbelief, but his anger dissipates at how small Yuuri looks. He almost feels bad. There's a red flush high on Yuuri's cheeks, and Viktor's jaw tightens, his anger gathering itself back together. It's like a glaring red light, telling him no, stop, stay where you are, don't go any further. 

“Is it because of the banquet?” Yuuri presses, and Viktor’s lips thin. His eyes narrow on Yuuri's flushed cheeks. 

Every time Yuuri blushes, it's a reminder to stay away, to stay detached. This is Chris' boyfriend.

“No. After,” Viktor replies dully.

He walks away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank u for the comments!!!!! <3 super nice to see that u guys remember this fic hehe.


	3. Chapter 3

Viktor sits in front of the piano, his fingers lax on the keys.

It doesn’t matter what he does, he can't help but remember. He can't help but remember the way Yuuri had taken his hand and danced with him. The feel of Yuuri's hand on his waist, the way Yuuri had led him expertly across the dance floor. The way they danced, not to the upbeat pop surrounding them, but to the music Yuuri's body made.

Viktor remembers the muscles in Yuuri's body, how expertly Yuuri had worked the pole. How Yuuri's body had wrapped around the fixture and Chris so sensually and teasingly that he immediately had everyone under his spell, Viktor included. Viktor had been-- _ is _ especially weak to his charms, to the way Yuuri's eyes burn in reciprocated desire. Viktor shivers, and his fingers flex.

Unbidden, his fingers start to play a melody of Yuuri, of the song of his body. The way they danced that night, this music would have been perfect. A tale of seduction and lust, a playboy going after the most beautiful man.

Viktor can't help but think of other things, of the way Yuuri had taken him clumsily but so erotically in his mouth. The way Yuuri had so thoroughly seduced him, mind, body, and soul. The way Yuuri had looked on his knees.

The music he ends up creating is missing other instruments and in need of polishing and work. And yet, it's better than anything he's made in the past few months.

*

How could Yuuri act like nothing was wrong? Did he really have no guilt in how he was treating Chris? How many more boys like him had there been?

Viktor glowers at himself in the mirror. It's not like he’s any better. He’s been pretending that everything is fine with Chris too. If Yuuri’s a Bad Boyfriend™, then Viktor is very much a Bad Friend™.

He takes in a deep, calming breath and releases it slowly. He just needs to work it through his system. Everything will be fine.

Viktor reaches for his phone and unlocks it. Before he knows it, he’s on Instagram. He hesitates, just for a moment, before he clicks to Chris’s profile. He’s not expecting to see much. Chris hardly posts pictures of his current boyfriends unless it’s been a month, and as far as he knew, Yuuri and Chris have only been official for two weeks now.

It doesn’t take long, however, for a picture of Yuuri from a month or so ago to finally pop out. It’s Chris, Yuuri, that other man Chris introduced him to during his birthday—Frank? Fabio???—and a brown-skinned man who looks the youngest out of the four. They all have their own pole, all of them posing.

Viktor’s mouth dries at the way Yuuri is splitting against the pole, a shy smile on his lips as he peeks through his arm. Fuck, he’s known that Yuuri must be flexible, but Yuuri didn’t do this move during Chris’s banquet. Until now, Viktor hadn’t been aware just  _ how _ flexible. 

He groans slightly and closes his eyes, pressing his phone against his forehead. Fuck, fuck, fuck. Such a fucking bad idea.

He takes in a deep breath and opens his eyes.

**[picture]**

January 20, 2016

❤ JJleroy!15, milalab and 189 others

**christophe-gc ** who says boys can’t pole dance? 

> **phichit+chu ** omg!! we’re so cute. send me the other pics!

> **francis-m ** good thing yuuri doesn’t have IG, he’d probs make u take this down haha

He frowns slightly. Damn. Yuuri doesn’t have an Instagram. He presses on  **phichit+chu** ’s username and thankfully, it’s not private. He notes that Phichit has around 1k followers.

His eyes widen when he scrolls down and actually sees the pictures. Jackpot. Slowly, he keeps scrolling, just feasting on the trove of Yuuri pictures. He’s probably in one out of three pictures on  **phichit+chu** ’s Instagram, and that’s saying a lot with the vast number of pictures posted. 

Roommate? Best friend? Both, probably. He goes back to the top and scrolls down slower, to  _ really _ look at the pictures. Compared to Chris’s Instagram full of shirtless selfies and club photos, there’s nothing risqué. The pictures with Yuuri are more domestic, stolen snapshots over meals, in their house, and a variety of other places with a various number of people. The most recent risqué photo is from two weeks ago, a little before Viktor saw Yuuri for the first time, and it’s another picture in the pole dancing studio. From the little square, he can see the same brown-skinned man and Chris in the bottom corners.

He clicks on that to enlarge it as he walks toward his bed and can’t help but laugh. It’s an obviously candid picture of Yuuri with the way  [ Yuuri ](http://poledancedictionary.com/moves/265/chinese-flag/) isn’t even looking at the camera. He’s holding himself up by his spread arms, his legs up with one almost touching the pole. Chris and Phichit are both squatting down on the floor on either side of Yuuri, their hands pressed together and their heads bowed down.

**[picture]**

January 20, 2016

❤ JJleroy!15, milalab and 340 others

**phichit+chu ** Praise Katsuki Yuuri for his fine ass and thicc thighs #blessed

> **christophe-gc** almost as nice as mine

Viktor lies down on his bed and continues to scroll through Phichit’s other pictures, pausing every now and then to stare at Yuuri whenever he’s in the picture. Makkachin somehow makes her way inside the room while he’s scrolling and jumps up onto his bed.

He strokes her soft fur with one hand while the other continues scrolling through Phichit’s feed.

[picture: Yuuri smiling shyly at Phichit across the table, a plate of Yam Nua in front of him]

**phichit+chu** Aww, my fave roomie surprised me w Yam Nua. Not as good as mom’s, but getting there! #BestRoommateEver #myBFFisbetterthanyours #thaifood

[picture: Selfie of Phichit, background Yuuri on the floor, legs spread wide in a side split and head on the floor in front of him]

**phichit+chu ** lol look who fell asleep while stretching #itsYuuri #dancemajorsdoitbetter #spreadem

[picture: bowl of katsudon]

**phichit+chu** Yuuri finally took me to try Mama Katsuki’s famous katsudon  #katsudon #yummy #food

[picture: selfie of Phichit and Yuuri, Yuuri wearing a navy blue costume]

**phichit+chu** So proud of my BFF!!!!! Amazing performance #ballet #YuuriKatsuki

Viktor didn’t know what he expected from basically stalking Yuuri, but he definitely didn’t expect this. Yes, he was infatuated with dark, half-lidded eyes and teasing smiles but—this Yuuri was different. The infatuation and obsession and lust should have disappeared the moment Viktor realized the man from Chris’s banquet wasn’t Yuuri’s normal self at all. 

The Yuuri on Phichit’s Instagram is soft, just like how Chris described, but at the same time, there are so many other words to describe him. Shy, easily flustered, determined, passionate, caring, confident, thoughtful, talented. There’s so much about Yuuri that Viktor didn’t know and… He doesn’t want to admit it, but he wants to get to know Yuuri.

Fuck. Okay. He needs to get rid of his infatuation. He can do that.

Tuesday, February 21

Viktor stares at the entrance to Yutopia, his heart racing. All he needs to do is see Yuuri. One last time, just enough to appease the want in him, and then...keep his distance. 

Until Chris eventually breaks up with Yuuri.

(Then what? Play with Yuuri until Viktor eventually breaks up with him too?)

He releases a long breath. Easy. If there's anything Viktor knows how to do, it’s controlling himself. Every aspect of his life is controlled, from his schedule to his diet to how he plays the piano. He can handle this. 

"So, are you gonna stand there all day, or are you going to eat here?"

Viktor jolts and he stares, wide-eyed, at Yuuri’s sister. The look she’s giving him is dry and tinged with a hint of amusement. Viktor flushes and smiles widely, charmingly, without even thinking. It’s as automatic as breathing.

“Ah yes, I will eat here,” he says smoothly, looking up at the restaurant. He hopes he doesn’t sound as awkward as he thinks he does. From the corner of his eye, he thinks he sees Mari rolls her eyes. He looks at her fully then and watches she takes a drag from her cigarette and then releases it.

"Okay," Mari says shortly and turns her back to him. "Follow me then, please allow me to sit you."

Viktor follows and stays silent, choosing to watch Mari’s back instead of saying anything.

She sits him in almost the same place as yesterday and the lack of Yuuri is glaring now in the restaurant. He frowns and looks down at the table, playing with the paper napkins and the chopsticks. He only looks up when Mari comes back with a menu in hand.

“Ah, it’s fine, I’ll just have the katsudon,” he says airily.

She quirks an eyebrow. “Alright,” she says, and moves to walk away.

“Wait,” Viktor calls out and almost bites his tongue. “Is Yuuri…?” He trails off and closes his mouth tight. What is he doing? “Nevermind,” he mumbles and looks away. 

Mari makes an odd noise, almost like a laugh, and continues to walk away with a, “I’ll let him know you’re here,” tossed over her shoulder.

Viktor’s eyes widen and he opens his mouth again to tell her  _ no, no thank you, it’s fine _ , but words fail him. They stay stuck in his throat. This is what he wants, isn’t it? To see Yuuri again, one last time. He swallows.

He looks around him and takes in the decorations of the room. He was distracted last time by Chris and Yuuri, but now he can actually see. There are pictures of Japan, a row of trophies in the corner, and odd knick-knacks Viktor can’t quite name. There are frames that Viktor’s too far away to see, but he assumes they’re pictures of Yuuri and his family.

Mari comes back moments later, not with Yuuri, but with a bowl of katsudon. He nods at her in thanks and then turns towards his food and opens up his chopsticks.

He eats idly, his brows furrowed as he scrolls through his feed. What will he even do when Yuuri gets here? Viktor doesn’t think he can handle talking to him, not with the way Yuuri looks. Not with the way Viktor wants him. He steels himself as he continues to make his way through the bowl.

He hears rather than sees Yuuri walk in. The bell over the entrance rings and Viktor looks up just in time to meet Yuuri's wide-eyed gaze. He watches as Yuuri turns toward his sister and says something to her that Viktor isn't quite close enough to hear. He looks down at his food and through his fringe, tries to subtly watch the siblings. It's enough for him to see Yuuri gesture at him, the other man's face red and flushed.

Viktor can’t tell if the flush on his cheeks is from embarrassment or effort. He’s wearing the kind of outfit that Yuri wears to ballet, black tights that cling appealingly to the muscles of his legs and a loose black shirt. His hair is messy and pushed back, Viktor can’t tell if it’s from a product or from his sweat.

He watches as Yuuri disappears into the back room. He comes back a minute later, an apron tied at his front. Viktor tries not to panic as Yuuri walks toward him and instead stares down at his katsudon as he mechanically eats it. It’s good, hell, it’s delicious, but Viktor’s mind is running on overdrive trying to think of what to say. Its taste is the last thing on his mind.

Yuuri stops in front of him, a small, shy smile on his lips, just like in Phichit’s picture of him when Yuuri surprised him with Thai food, and Viktor tries not to die.

“Is um, Chris with you?” Yuuri asks lightly and Viktor purses his lips. He smiles instead, a little too wide, and he knows it doesn’t reach his eyes.

“No,” he says.

Yuuri’s smile falters. “Ah,” Yuuri replies. The silence that follows can only be described as awkward. Yuuri fidgets slightly, his hands coming up to twist his apron, and Viktor’s lips quirk. Of course, the only connection between the two of them is Chris, and Chris isn’t here, so what now?

_ Kiss him, _ his mind whispers traitorously,  _ that’s what you did the last time Chris wasn’t there. _

Viktor viciously pushes it back, ducking his head in mingled frustration and shame. He hopes that his face isn’t turning red, but with the way Yuuri is looking at him, he has small hopes.

“Are you ah, okay?” Yuuri asks.

Viktor laughs. It sounds fake even to his own ears. “Yes, just thinking.”

Yuuri nods slowly. “Mari said you were looking for me?” he says it like a question, his gaze curious, and Viktor has to look away.

“Yes,” he says. He makes a show of looking at his watch. He’s done eating anyway. He’s done. “I have to go,” he says stiffly, and he looks up just in time to see the brief flash of disappointment on Yuuri’s face. He stands up from the booth and Yuuri steps away to give him space.

“Oh, alright,” Yuuri says awkwardly and smiles as he bows. “Thank you for eating here, please come again.”

“Tomorrow,” Viktor blurts out. His eyes widen. Did he really just say that? Yuuri looks up, his eyes just as wide, and Viktor coughs. No. This was supposed to be the last time, he should take it back, he should—

“I’ll see you tomorrow, then,” Yuuri says, his cheeks reddening slightly and Viktor stares.  _ Red light, red light, red light, _ he reminds himself.  _ Stop, don’t, keep away. _

“Never mind,” he should say. It’s the right thing to say.  _ Stay away, stay away, don’t do it. _

“I’ll see you,” he says instead and walks away.

That night, he doesn’t dream of dark eyes and sultry smiles, or thick thighs and toned arms against a pole. He doesn’t dream of Yuuri on his knees and his red lips.

Instead, he dreams of Yuuri, just looking up at him with a shy smile and flushed cheeks.

Wednesday, February 22

Viktor, against all odds, finds himself in Yutopia again. Today is the last day, he promises himself. One more time.

“You’re here again,” Mari says, raising her eyebrows in amusement. 

Viktor gives her an easy smile. “I’m here again,” he repeats cheekily.

Mari rolls her eyes. “Yuuri went to walk Vicchan, but he’ll be back in a while,” Mari offers without Viktor even asking, and Viktor tries not to blush. Is he that obvious? He chooses not to say anything in reply to that and just stiffly nods. 

This time, Mari brings him to the opposite side of the restaurant, right underneath the shelves of trophies. He doesn’t sit at first. He tilts his head and peers curiously at the plaques. 

They’re Yuuri’s. Of course they are. He hums and reaches up to trace the edges of the newer, shinier ones. Most of them are in English, dance competitions that Viktor’s heard of every now and then from his cousin. Small, local competitions combined with regional and even international dance contests. It’s mostly ballet, but Viktor spots a few for hip hop and ballroom dancing. The ones at the bottom are in Japanese, unreadable to his eye, but he guesses they’re for Yuuri too. 

He wonders if Yuuri joins any pole dancing competitions. Maybe soon, if Chris pushes him to. He wonders when Yuuri moved to Detroit with his family and why. His hand falls back on his side, and he frowns at his own reflection. There’s so much he wants to know about Yuuri. Viktor scoffs immediately after the thought. What an idea! Getting to know the guy who cheated on one of your best friends, cheated with you, nonetheless.

Just as he’s about to sit down, he hears a bark, and he automatically turns his head. Viktor’s eyes widen. He tries not to let his jaw drop when he sees, but he fails.

Yuuri is on his knees, and there’s a brown, tiny poodle enthusiastically licking at his face. It looks like a smaller version of Makkachin, but just as cute. Viktor whimpers and covers his face. 

He peeks through his hands just in time to see Yuuri smile, bright and unguarded. It’s so different from his small, shy smiles, and Viktor feels in awe just looking at it. His hands drop to his sides and he stares unabashedly at the open joy in Yuuri’s face and the obvious love he has for his dog.

Yuuri looks up then, and Viktor’s eyes widen at being caught staring. Yuuri’s smile drops. He looks shy again, withdrawn and flustered but still so handsome. He watches as Yuuri stands up and gives Mari the leash of his dog before he makes his way over to Viktor, grabbing a menu on the way.

“Hi, sorry, would you like to sit down?” Yuuri asks and Viktor silently nods. He reaches behind him for the chair and sits down. He and takes the menu that Yuuri offers him.

“I’ll just be here for a while,” Viktor says dimly, and Yuuri nods. “I was wondering what you’d recommend for dessert?” he asks.

Yuuri blinks at him in obvious surprise. “Eh, well, I like all of them,” Yuuri says and then flushes a bright red. Viktor smiles, despite himself.

“What’s your favorite?” He asks, trying not to sound too eager.

“Ah well, if you’re going to keep coming here, you can just try one every day,” Yuuri says, a note of teasing in his voice and Viktor’s eyebrows shoot up. Yuuri looks down right after, a nervous laugh escaping his lips. He self-consciously touches his neck.

Viktor’s lips quirk. “Surprise me with my first then,” Viktor says softly and Yuuri looks up to give him a small smile, another one for Viktor’s dragon hoard.

Yuuri leaves but comes back in a few minutes, a plate in hand with numerous tiny sweets on top of it and a teapot. He places it in front of Viktor, and Viktor tilts his head, his nose wrinkling as he wonders how he’s supposed to eat it.

“Eto, these are Wagashi,” Yuuri says. He points out each of the confections as he names them, “Daifuku, dango, and yokan.”

“Vkusno!” he praises once he tastes the daifuku. It’s pleasantly sweet, a little odd in his mouth, but tasty nonetheless. He tries all of it, achingly aware of Yuuri watching him taste test them. He looks up to see Yuuri give him a pleased smile and in surprise, Viktor smiles back. His heart flutters painfully in his chest.

How can a man with a smile that sweet act the way he does on a pole? How can a man who looks at his dog with such love in his eyes be the same man who cheats on his boyfriend with no regret in his eyes when he sees him and the guy he cheated on him with?

*

Viktor sits in front of the piano again that night. What he has in mind needs more than a piano, but this is all he has right now.

Something slow and melancholic. Something more innocent and pure than Eros. He closes his eyes and imagines how it would sound with an orchestra and someone singing.

He puts his hands on the keys and plays.

Soft and sweet.

Just like the Wagashi.

Just like Yuuri.

Thursday, February 23

Today is the last day. Yuuri promised more sweets like the Wagashi, it’s only polite to go. One more time and then Viktor is done. No more Yuuri.

Mari doesn’t even say anything this time when Viktor shows up at lunchtime. She leads him to a table at the side again, this time near the picture frames. Viktor quietly takes in the pictures of a younger, chubby Yuuri, that same shy smile on his lips.

He’s enamored at the obviously candid pictures of Yuuri, when his smiles are at their brightest and widest, just like how he looks at his dog. That’s when he looks the most relaxed and unguarded, unaware of the camera. Viktor finds himself wanting again, already familiar with the ache.

This time, when Yuuri shows up, he’s dressed in dance attire again, but he doesn’t look flushed or sweaty like he did two days ago.

“Are you, ah, going to practice after?” Viktor asks when Yuuri passes by him and Yuuri looks up from his phone.

“Oh,” Yuuri replies, tilting his head at Viktor. “Yeah, I have ballet after this at 1.”

Viktor hums, trying not to look too interested. “What are your other dance classes? How’s your schedule like?”

Yuuri blinks at him in surprise. Belatedly, Viktor realizes that the fact he’s actually asking is enough of a hint that he’s more curious than he should be.

“Well, I have Latin Dance on Monday and Wednesday at 5 PM, hip hop on Tuesdays and Saturdays, and then ballet on Thursday, Saturday, and Sunday, but I try to fit in some practice on other days. Then well, pole dance class on Tuesdays, and then Chris and I have a private pole dance session on Sundays.” Viktor winces inwardly at that, a memory of Yuri’s disgust at Yuuri and Chris’s ‘private pole dance sessions’ flashing in his mind, but thankfully, Yuuri doesn’t notice.

He licks his lips and swallows, wondering what to say.

“Does Chris treat you well?” he asks, and his voice is softer than he intended it to be, a little too revealing. Yuuri gives him an odd look and smiles slightly, fondly, as his eyes flick up to the ceiling.

“Yeah.” Yuuri laughs. “He takes care of me. He’s, well, he’s helped me a lot with being more confident in myself and eh, feeling sexy.” Yuuri blushes at that and Viktor feels a pang.

“Of course, Chris is the master of sex appeal.” Viktor snorts. He can’t even argue with that.

Yuuri ducks his head, a sheepish smile playing on his lips as he shrugs. “So, you’ve known Chris for a while then, yeah?” Yuuri asks, and Viktor nods in confirmation as he picks up a bite of food. “Does he flirt with you too, then?” Yuuri asks.

Viktor pauses, his chopsticks halfway to his mouth. He narrows his eyes as he looks at Yuuri, trying to gauge if Yuuri looks bothered, but all he can sense is a bit of amusement. 

“Does it bother you when he flirts?” he asks casually instead of answering the question. 

Yuuri laughs, rolling his eyes. “At first, but you get used to it after a while. He isn’t Chris if he isn’t a flirt.” Yuuri shrugs. It doesn’t seem like a lie. He genuinely does seem unbothered, and so often, Chris’s flirtatious ways have driven his other boyfriends off. Yuuri looks down at his phone again and his eyebrows furrow. He exhales.

“I have to go,” Yuuri says. He opens his mouth, looking like he’s about to say something more, but he quickly closes it. “Bye,” he says softly.

Viktor echoes it. Yuuri shoots him another small, shy smile and…Viktor looks at his lips and wants. Not Yuuri’s lips wrapped around his cock—fuck, Viktor wants that too, but all Viktor wants right now is to see him smile like how he smiled yesterday.

Friday, February 24

"You're being stupid."

"I know."

"Does Chris know?"

"Maybe."

Mila gives him a dry, unamused look and shakes her head. Beside her, Yuri is giving him an exasperated look, his lip curled in disgust. Viktor avoids her gaze and stares at his music sheets.

“I’m not going today,” Viktor promises. He said to himself that yesterday was his last, there’s no good excuse to go there for lunch now. 

Yuri scoffs and rolls his eyes. “Shut up, of course you are. Don’t even bother lying,” Yuri grumbles. Viktor gives him a tight, unamused smile. Beside him, Makkachin wags her tail and looks at him. He reaches out to pet her absentmindedly, and Mila sighs.

“Okay, we’re going with you to see your crush,” she says, and Viktor freezes.

“What, no!” he protests, but Yuri cuts him off quickly.

“We’re going with you, asshole. You and your fucking crush, I swear to God you’re worse than Georgi.”

Viktor stares at them, his eyes wide. “I don’t have a crush,” he says, and the two of them give him matching looks of disbelief.

“It’s not a crush!” he cries, rising up to stand, his eyes wild and his hair disheveled.

Yuri groans in exasperation. “Whatever, come on. Let’s just go. I’m hungry as fuck.”

By the time the three of them get to the restaurant, Yuuri is already there in his little apron. He looks different, and Viktor can’t place why. He frowns, narrowing his eyes as he tries to observe Yuuri. Beside him, Mila and Yuri are chatting and snickering to each other.

“Stop fucking staring, what the fuck,” Yuri hisses to him, and Viktor jumps.

“I’m not staring,” he vehemently denies.

Mila laughs as she raises an eyebrow, her lips curling. “You’re practically staring a hole into him.” Mila giggles.

Eventually, Yuuri passes by them again, and Viktor figures it out. He looks more put together, so different from the dance clothes that Viktor’s been seeing him in every day the past 4 days. (Isn’t it weird how he’s been eating here for the past 4 days already? He couldn’t be any more obvious.)

But of course, Viktor finds him just as attractive as he did yesterday. Yuuri could show up in a trash bag and he’d probably still find him attractive.

“Oh, hey Yuri,” Yuuri says in surprise. Viktor frowns as Yuri grumbles something in reply, barely even looking at his namesake. Mila is looking over Yuuri, her gaze appraising, not even bothering to hide how her gaze goes up and down.

“Where you going, pig?” Yuri spits out, looking up at him through his bangs.

Yuuri winces. “Just somewhere with friends,” Yuuri murmurs, purposely vague. Viktor frowns. When Yuuri asks for their orders, he asks for tonkatsu this time instead of katsudon.

“How long have you known Yuuri again?” he asks Yuri once Yuuri is out of hearing range.

Yuri shrugs. “Don’t know. A while, I guess. He teaches ballet sometimes. He’s a pretty big name in the studio, but I don’t think he even realizes it.” 

“Big name how?” Viktor asks, curious despite himself. 

Yuri grunts in irritation. “He’s pretty decent in ballet, ballroom, and hip hop. He’s only started Latin Dance and pole recently, but of course, he’s a fucking natural at that too.” It sounds like it hurts for Yuri to admit it, and Viktor huffs in laughter. ‘Pretty decent’ in Yuri mean damn good.

“Sara said he showed up to Jazz class and was pretty beast at it,” Mila offers, resting her chin on her hands.

Yuri groans. “Yeah, we get it, the pig’s fucking good at dancing. Can we please stop talking about him?”

Viktor relents, even if he wants nothing more than to talk about him all day.

Saturday, February 25

One last. One last.

Viktor doesn’t need anyone to tell him he’s being stupid. Yesterday doesn’t count, he justifies, he was with Yuri and Mila. They’re the ones that pushed him to go to Yutopia. He wouldn’t have gone if it wasn’t for them. He would have stayed home and worked on Eros and Agape, maybe walk Makkachin too or go to the gym.

He knows damn well that isn’t true.

He ends up in front of Yutopia again and promises to himself (again) that today is the last day he’ll eat here.

Yuuri isn’t there.

“Where is he?” Viktor tries not to pout.

Mari hides her smile behind a cigarette. “He has class the whole day. He’s only free for dinner.”

“Oh,” Viktor says quietly, trying in vain to hide his disappointment. So what if Yuuri isn’t here? He has other things to do. Fuck, what is Viktor even doing, eating in the same restaurant every day just for a chance to see his best friend’s boyfriend? What is he thinking?

“I’ll let him know you were here,” Mari offers and Viktor immediately winces.

“No, it’s fine, I just…”

“You don’t have to eat here to pretend, you know. You can go, I know you’re only here for Yuuri,” Mari says, lowering her voice conspiratorially. Viktor’s eyes widen. Is he that obvious that even Yuuri’s sister knows? She barely knows him. What more Chris? How long will it take before Chris figures out Viktor has a crush on his boyfriend?

His mind freezes. 

No. 

Viktor does  _ not  _ have a crush on Yuuri, he doesn’t. It’s just attraction, infatuation, a mild obsession, yes, but he doesn’t have a  _ crush _ . That’s ridiculous. He blames Mila and Yuri for putting the word into his head.

He shakes his head and bids Mari farewell.

He does not have a crush on Yuuri. He does not have a crush on Yuuri. He does  _ not _ have a crush on Yuuri.

As he’s driving home and he reaches the stoplight, he groans and drops his head on to the wheel.

Fuck. Who is he kidding? He has a crush on Yuuri Katsuki, his best friend’s boyfriend.

Sunday, February 26

Viktor should have expected it to be busy today. It’s a Sunday, and Yutopia is filled with families and couples eating together. There’s no place for Viktor here.  There’s no place for Viktor in Yuuri’s life.

He watches from the entrance as Yuuri goes around the room, taking orders and delivering plates of steaming food. He finds himself missing Yuuri’s soft smiles as he sees the way Yuuri’s face tightens, how his smile looks like he’s struggling in the face of all the people eating and begging for his attention.

He hasn’t realized it until now, but the small, shy smiles Yuuri always gives him are genuine. Nothing like the way Yuuri is smiling now at Yutopia’s customers. Since when was Viktor privy to those kinds of smiles? Since when did Yuuri deem him worthy?

Yuuri finally notices him and strides towards him. Viktor’s breath catches in his throat as Yuuri smiles at him. It’s different now, now that he knows what Yuuri’s smile is worth.

“Hi, sorry, willing to wait?” Yuuri asks him breathlessly, a little flushed as he balances plates on his tray.

_ I’ll wait forever, _ Viktor wants to say.

“I’ll just go,” he says instead.

“Oh, okay,” Yuuri says. Viktor doesn’t know if the disappointment in his eyes is real, or if it’s just Viktor projecting his own disappointment onto him.

“Goodbye then, Viktor,” Yuuri says, ducking his head. Viktor drinks in his smile and locks it deep within his heart. When is the next time he’ll see Yuuri smile like that?

“Goodbye, Yuuri,” Viktor says, and he watches as Yuuri walks away. Goodbye forever.

How long will Chris and Yuuri last until Chris gets tired of him?

Willing to wait?

Monday, February 27

Viktor met Yuuri on a Monday. Today is the first day he’s resolving—for real this time—to keep Yuuri-free. Today is also a Monday. It's fitting.

He’s lived 27 years without Yuuri, without even knowing how the younger man smiles, or the way his lips taste, or the way he looks at Viktor when he’s drunk. 

He’s lived 27 years like today, so why is it so hard?

How do you get over someone you never dated? 

How do you get over your best friend’s boyfriend?

Google says:

  1. Don't Beat Yourself Up.
  2. Realize That Making A Move Will Probably Ruin Your Friendship.
  3. Avoid Being Alone With Him.
  4. Avoid Being Around The Two Of Them Together.
  5. Try To Figure Out Exactly Why You Like Him.
  6. Try To Focus On Someone or Something Else.
  7. Don't Tell Her Right Away.
  8. Think About Who Matters More.
  9. Don't Do Anything That Would Make It Possible To Cross A Line
  10. Only Talk To Her If It's Getting Out Of Control

Viktor’s already fucked up half of those steps.

Lunchtime passes. Viktor doesn’t go.

He sits in front of his piano and finds himself playing something new again, the bare bones of another song.

It’s not the raw and sexual beats of Eros, and it’s not quite like the innocence and the softness of Agape either.

It’s tangible longing and desperation, the ache in Viktor’s heart given life on chords and notes. It’s the most honest, most revealing thing Viktor’s ever written before. He’s never felt like this before, and it shows.

It doesn’t feel complete. 

It sounds beautiful and full of melancholy, a man searching for his lover, but it feels lacking. It feels like it’s missing something important, something vital. If Viktor really thinks about it, Eros and Agape sound just as lacking, just as incomplete. It’s not the lack of accompaniment that’s at fault.

He can’t help but think that...what it’s missing is someone dancing to it.

[phone]

Tuesday, February 28

“Have dinner with me and Yuuri again.”

“No,” Viktor says immediately. It’s not even a question. Just when he’s fully committed to his decision to avoid Yuuri forever and never see him again, Chris pulls this? He didn’t even go to Yutopia today or yesterday, choosing instead to keep his promise for real this time.

Chris squawks and puts his drink down. “Why not?” he whines, pouting for good measure. Viktor stares at him with cool blue eyes and sighs inwardly when Chris only flutters his eyelashes in return. He can tell that Chris is trying to make his green eyes as big and as irresistible as possible in the hope that he’ll give in this time. Viktor’s no stranger to Chris’s eyelashes but somehow, it still works.

He looks away. “I don’t think it’s a good idea.”

Chris stares at him. “Well, I heard that you’ve been having lunch at Yuuri’s restaurant,” he says flatly, tone vaguely accusing, and Viktor winces. He tries to pass it off by laughing sheepishly, but he’s rattled. Fuck.

“I’m sorry,” he starts but Chris cuts him off before he can continue. 

“Nothing to apologize for,” Chris replies calmly. “I just don’t understand why it’s okay for you to see him every day, but when I ask for a little dinner with two of my favorite people in the world, you refuse.”

“He hasn’t told you, has he?” Viktor says quietly, half aware of the wry smile twisting his lips into something ugly. 

Chris tilts his head and cooly, he replies, “No.”

Viktor clenches his eyes shut, his grip tightening on his mug. Fuck.  _ Tell him, tell him, tell him. _ Why can’t Yuuri just make things easier for him and tell Chris already? Viktor opens his eyes and looks at Chris, trying to hide the tightness in his expression. With the way Chris is looking at him, it doesn’t seem to be working. Chris looks annoyed and frustrated. 

(What will he look like when he finds out about Yuuri and Viktor?)

Viktor sucks in a heavy breath. 

“Are you mad?” Viktor finally asks, his eyebrows pinching together. “You know I don’t know how to react when someone’s mad at me.”

“I’m not mad,” Chris replies simply. “Just have dinner with us, Bärchen.”

Viktor stares at him and brushes away the fringe that’s covering his left eye. “I don’t know,” he says carefully. It doesn’t feel right. It doesn’t feel  _ safe _ .

Chris frowns. He gives Viktor a long, silent look, and Viktor looks away. He can’t look Chris in the eye without thinking of how Chris will look when he finds out what Viktor’s done.

“Just have dinner with us,” Chris repeats. “I think you have the wrong idea of Yuuri; he’s very sweet. I swear the two of you will get along—in fact, I’d  _ prefer _ if the two of you get along.”

Viktor stares at him.  _ Yes _ , he wants to say, _ I do fucking know how very sweet Yuuri is, I’ve stalked all of his best friend’s pictures and all the pictures you have of him. _

“Fine,” he replies instead, voice clipped and flat. “I’m free again tomorrow evening.”

Chris beams and leans forward to place both his hands on Viktor’s face. “Great!” Chris cheers, pinching his cheeks, and Viktor shakes his head, swatting his hands away. 

Chris laughs, pulling away to settle back into his chair.

“Now, the other thing I wanted to ask you about,” Chris says seriously, and Viktor drops his head onto his upright hand, gesturing Chris to continue. “How’s the music that you’ve been composing? How’s it going?”

Viktor’s relieved at the change of topic, his shoulders loosening. He looks up to give Chris a smile. “It’s going well. I’ve…I’ve been inspired lately,” he replies, purposefully hedging. It’s no good to say that it’s Chris’s boyfriend who’s been inspiring him. There’s no way to say that without it being weird.

He shares more about the pieces he’s been working on, Eros and Agape, trying not to be too obvious who it’s about. Thankfully, the conversation flows easily. Chris updates him on his nightclub and the topic of Yuuri stays as the awkward pink elephant in the room.

They leave the café after a few minutes of talk, and they hug goodbye. Viktor closes his eyes and tries not to grip Chris too tightly, tries not to hold on and let the hug drag on longer than it normally does. He doesn’t know if they’ll ever hug again once Chris finally finds out.

He watches Chris leave, his heart aching inside of him with shame and guilt.


	4. Chapter 4

Chris is late.

Viktor sits across Yuuri, his heart beating loud enough in his chest that he won’t be surprised if Yuuri could hear it. He takes a deep breath, trying in vain to calm his excited heart.

Yuuri sips nervously from his glass of water, eyeing him over the rim of his glass. Viktor can’t quite understand the look in his eyes.

“You didn’t show up yesterday,” Yuuri blurts out. 

Viktor stiffens.

Yuuri’s eyes widen, and he ducks his head, staring intensely down at the placemat. He pokes at the utensils, anxiously arranging them, each movement stiff with embarrassment.

“I… yeah,” Viktor lamely replies, feeling a little off-footed. What was he supposed to say to that?  _ No, I didn’t show up because I promised myself I was going to get over you since you’re my best friend’s boyfriend? _ He winces.

The two of them fall into an awkward silence, nothing left to say. Viktor tries to watch Yuuri without making himself obvious. Yuuri is still fiddling around with everything on the table, and Viktor can’t help but smile.

“You know, I don’t know why I expected Chris to be on time,” Yuuri grumbles eventually, breaking the silence. A little exasperated, but there’s an undercurrent of fondness in his words that Viktor can’t ignore.

Viktor huffs in amusement and shakes his head. “Never on time, that asshole,” he agrees and Yuuri laughs, covering his mouth. Viktor finds himself smiling too, and he quickly presses his lips together, looking away to hide it.

He opens his mouth, about to say something else, but Chris suddenly appears. He slips into the open seat beside Yuuri and plants a kiss on the top of his boyfriend’s head. Yuuri blushes the exact shade of red that’s been plaguing Viktor’s mind ever since they’ve met, and Viktor’s jaw tightens. 

Yuuri pushes Chris away, but Chris doesn’t even look offended.

“Hello,” he greets them both, beaming, and Viktor dips his head. He forces a smile, trying to hide the tightness in his gut. With the way Chris frowns at him, Viktor knows he’s not succeeding. 

Chris sends him a look of concern, but Viktor shakes his head in answer. He doesn’t want to talk about it, and he tries to convey that with his eyes. Chris acts like he has no care sometimes, but he’s one of the most empathetic people that Viktor knows. He’s being so concerned for Viktor right now, and here Viktor is wanting his boyfriend like a homewrecker.

“Have you guys ordered already?” Chris asks. 

Viktor and Yuuri both shake their heads. Yuuri passes Chris the menu, and Chris flips through it. Viktor’s unsure what he himself should be doing, choosing instead to eye the two of them speculatively, at the easy way Yuuri lets Chris into his space like it’s nothing.

They order once Chris has made his decision. For a few minutes after that, the three of them chat awkwardly about mundane topics, nothing that really matters. 

Again, Viktor can’t help but appreciate Yuuri and Chris as a couple. Yuuri is shy, his attempts at conversation stilted whenever he tries, but Chris rides underneath it and flows with him easily, picking up the slack in the conversation and directing the attention elsewhere whenever Yuuri seems to falter. Chris is good for him. Viktor has to admit it.

He doesn’t know if it’s Chris’s presence that’s making him like this, making his replies as short and as noncommittal as Yuuri’s, but Chris is handling it and him as exceedingly well as he handles Yuuri. If Chris rides underneath Yuuri’s awkwardness and shyness, Chris rises over Viktor’s bluntness and smooths over it. 

He’s been holding up their conversation the whole time as if it’s nothing, and maybe for Chris, it is. He doesn’t know if Chris really understands just how good he is with people, but he feels like Chris only uses his innate empathy and his knowledge of how people work when he’s trying to seduce them.

Viktor tries to sneak glances at Yuuri, but Yuuri is resolutely avoiding his gaze and staring instead at his almost finished food.

Chris whistles and raises his hand.

Viktor perks up. Chris ignores his curious look, waiting for the waiter to come to their table. Chris smiles flirtatiously at the waiter, and Viktor frowns. His eyes dart toward Yuuri’s, and he catches Yuuri rolling his eyes.

Viktor thinks he understands Yuuri a little better now. Maybe Yuuri was just like that because he actually  _ was _ bothered by his boyfriend being an insane flirt.

“Can I see your wine list, please?” Chris asks, batting his long eyelashes and Viktor stiffens. Yuuri squeaks from beside Chris and shoots him a panicked look. Viktor tries to hide his own. 

The last time he was with Yuuri under the influence of alcohol, it didn’t end well. All Chris does is smile at Yuuri; it doesn’t seem to do anything when Yuuri frantically shakes his head in reply.

Viktor watches as Yuuri hisses something quietly to Chris that Viktor can’t hear. Chris only smirks at Yuuri and murmurs something back that makes Yuuri flush bright red.

The waiter comes back quickly enough, and Chris peruses it, choosing a bottle of wine easily. Viktor doesn’t catch the name, but when the waiter returns once more with a bottle and three glasses, Viktor spares a glance at the label. Grudgingly, he appreciates it. It looks expensive.

Chris beams brightly as he pours them all a glass each. He passes it to Viktor and Yuuri, and Viktor takes his without hesitation, but he notes the hesitant way Yuuri takes his. There’s a smug smile on Chris’s face, and Viktor feels a curl of worry in his gut.

“Cheers,” Chris winks at Viktor. Viktor forces himself to smile. The three of them drink. 

It seems like alcohol is just what they need. It loosens their tongues and it sets Viktor at ease, something he’s thankful for, considering how tense being in Yuuri’s presence makes him. Before Viktor even knows what’s happening, they’ve polished off the whole bottle and ordered another. They’re halfway through the second when a delightful flush starts to form high on Yuuri’s cheeks. Viktor stares at it unabashed. Asian glow, he thinks deliriously and licks his suddenly dry lips.

Yuuri is tipsy, little giggles bursting from him as he eyes Viktor, a bit of his bashfulness still masking something that Viktor wants to uncover.

“Yuuri is really great on the pole,” Chris tells Viktor seriously.

Viktor snorts. Does Chris even have to tell him? Viktor was there during his birthday, Yuuri on the pole isn’t something Viktor’s going to forget anytime soon—or at all, actually, if Viktor is going to be honest with himself.

“I noticed,” Viktor drawls in reply, and he can’t help but drop his head languidly on his hand as he gazes at Yuuri. “I’d like to see it again,” he admits, his tongue loose enough for him to let go of words he didn’t even want to say to himself. The blush and the flustered smile Yuuri sends his way makes it worth it. It’s almost enough to make him forget.

“It’s Chris, really, he’s helped me a lot to be more confident in myself.” Yuuri giggles. Viktor’s heart skips a beat at the sound, enough that he doesn’t feel the pang in his chest when Chris beams at Yuuri. “If only he followed the no flirting in class rule,” Yuuri continues. He gives Chris a mock glare but Chris only shrugs in reply, a small smile on his lips.

“Ah, well, I wouldn’t be able to stop myself from flirting with you either,” Viktor says casually, without even really thinking of what he’s saying. 

Yuuri’s eyes widen, and Viktor freezes. He's suddenly reminded of who exactly he’s semi-flirting with. He shoots Chris a guilty, panicked look, Chris only gives him an odd smile that Viktor would describe as 'encouraging' if it wasn't for the context.

“I’m just going to go to the restroom,” Yuuri slurs slightly, his eyes still wide as saucers. Chris stands up to let him pass, and Yuuri staggers to the restroom.

Viktor glances at Chris, trying to get a sense of Chris’s mood. As if he can feel Viktor’s gaze, Chris turns his head to meet his eyes, a smirk on his full lips.

“Wouldn’t be able to stop yourself from flirting with him, huh,” Chris says teasingly, and Viktor winces. He should know better. The alcohol is no excuse.

“Sorry for flirting with him in front of you,” Viktor apologizes.

Chris’s perfect eyebrows draw together as he gives Viktor an incredulous stare. “Viktor,” he scolds, “I don’t mind if you guys flirt in front of me.” The tone of his voice is still as playful as ever. 

Chris actually doesn’t seem mad at all, and Viktor can feel himself relaxing. There must be something with the way he’s looking at Chris though, with the way Chris suddenly flutters his long eyelashes at him.

“I mean, I flirt with everything that has a heartbeat, and if you and Yuuri can deal with that, I can deal with a little harmless flirting from the both of you.”

Viktor blinks, and Chris grins. Harmless flirting? Would Chris still call it harmless if he knew what had happened between Viktor and Yuuri a week ago?

“Don’t tell me you’re a prude now.” Chris pouts. 

Viktor huffs, shaking his head in amusement. Viktor hears a beep from Chris’s phone, and he looks up to see Chris read the incoming message, a frown forming on his face. Chris looks like he’s on the verge of saying something when Yuuri suddenly appears at the side of their table.

Viktor barely restrains himself from jumping in surprise. Fuck, he didn’t even hear or notice Yuuri walking towards them.

“Yuuri,” Chris says, still distractedly by his phone, “I’m going to go outside for a bit, come with me?”

Yuuri nods and follows Chris when he stands up. Chris grabs his arm and leads him out of the restaurant. Yuuri shoots a glance back at Viktor, his dark eyes limpid and  _ longing, _ and Viktor stiffens. His face heats up and tucks his face into his collar, trying to hide how flustered he feels. It’s so uncharacteristic of him that he berates himself.

_ What was that _ , he moans,  _ Chris is right there. _

In his solitude, Viktor eyes the glasses still left on the table. Some are still half-full. He probably shouldn’t drink anymore, he tells himself. 

It would be a shame to waste, though. He drinks Chris’s glass and finishes it before he takes Yuuri’s and finishes that too. 

Chris and Yuuri are gone long enough that the additional alcohol starts to hit him. He feels a little light-headed and tipsy. Viktor glares at the glasses. He doesn’t think he even drank that much.

The sound of the entrance bell rings out, and he looks up to see Chris dragging Yuuri back inside the restaurant, their hands linked together. They stop in front of the booth, and Viktor can tell by the look on Chris’s face that what he’s about to say isn’t anything good.

“I need to go,” Chris says, and Viktor sighs at the confirmation, “there’s an emergency in Intoxicated that needs my attention.”

Viktor frowns. He looks from Chris to Yuuri, then back to Chris again. Is Yuuri going to leave with Chris or is Chris going to leave Viktor and Yuuri together again?

“Okay,” he says, and Chris’s grin turns devious. Viktor hates that grin; it never means anything good. He hates Chris’s next words even more.

“It would be great if you brought Yuuri home. I would, but it’s out of the way and you know it’s near your place anyway.”

He pales, his jaw clenching as he looks at Yuuri. Memories of that night flood his mind, and suddenly, all Viktor can think about is Yuuri on his knees and the look on his face. Yuuri seems to be remembering it too, with the way he tenses beside Chris. Chris’s hand comes up to rest high on Yuuri’s back, and Viktor’s heart tightens. 

Will Chris be that comforting if he knows the real reason Yuuri is so tense?

“It’s not a problem, right?” Chris asks, his voice low and deep and yes, yes it is a problem, but Viktor finds himself nodding anyway.

“No,” he says faintly, hardly believing himself. He looks away from Yuuri guiltily. “It’s not a problem at all.”

Chris smirks at him, nodding in goodbye before he leaves. Viktor and Yuuri both watch him go, the silence suddenly uncomfortable.

“Hey,” Yuuri says softly. Viktor stiffens as he looks up at his friend’s boyfriend. Yuuri leans closer, placing his hand on top of Viktor’s, and Viktor’s breath hitches at how near Yuuri is and the alcohol-dazed look in his eyes.

“You don’t have to bring me home if you don’t want to,” Yuuri murmurs, blinking at him with warm brown eyes. “It’s not that far, I can just walk home by myself.” The slur in his voice tells Viktor it’s a bad idea to let him walk home by himself. Images of Yuuri not making the short walk by himself flood his mind.

What’s the lesser sin? Letting himself face the temptation that’s Yuuri Katsuki again? Or letting his friend’s boyfriend walk home late at night by himself and potentially get hurt?

Viktor stares up at Yuuri and notes his flushed cheeks. He shuts his eyes tight and takes in a deep breath, trying in vain to block out the image in his mind. Yuuri looks eerily innocent, his wide eyes and red-stained cheeks only serving to make him look younger than he actually is. How is this the same man from weeks ago?

“It’s fine,” Viktor says and seals his fate.

They leave.

Surprisingly, the walk back to Yuuri’s apartment isn't tense like Viktor expects it to be. Viktor’s guard is admittedly down at Yuuri’s silence. He glances over at Yuuri, observing the way Yuuri is frowning, looking lost in thought. 

There’s something about tonight. It might be the way the moonlight hits Yuuri’s face, making him look softer and ethereal. It might be the way his hair is falling around his face, framing it in a way that makes him look deceptively innocent. It might even be the crisp night air, the odd silence and the stillness of the night, only occasionally broken by passing cars.

It’s enough to make Viktor feel like he’s alone with Yuuri.

“I don’t know if I’ve mentioned it, but I love your music,” Yuuri speaks up, cutting into the silence. Viktor turns his head to face him, his lips shut, but it doesn’t look like Yuuri is even looking at him, much less expecting a reply. There’s a shy smile on his lips when he finally turns to face Viktor.

“I dance to your music all the time,” Yuuri continues, his voice hushed, and Viktor makes a sound like he’s been punched. The languid and easy way Yuuri says it is so at odds with how the admission shocks Viktor straight to his bones. He can’t help but remember the recent nights he’s been spending on the piano, trying desperately in vain to create music that could come anywhere near to the music Yuuri makes with his body. 

He can’t help but remember all the nights he’s been trying and failing to fix what’s missing with the pieces Yuuri inspired. Eros and Agape, and even that unnamed, bare bones of a piece that’s barely anything. And here Yuuri is, telling him that he dances to the music Viktor makes, music that seems so mediocre now that Viktor’s actually writing pieces that matter again. Pieces that are already better in their incomplete form than the existing pieces Viktor’s made.

“I’d like to see you dance,” Viktor says quietly, and at that moment, he’s nothing but glad that he’s looking at Yuuri. It means that he doesn’t miss the way Yuuri looks back at him and smiles, soft and sweet and beautiful. Viktor can live in this moment. He can compose an entire movie soundtrack based solely on the way Yuuri is looking at him right now. 

As if Viktor is his entire world. As if no one’s ever made him as happy as Viktor.

Viktor wets his lips and thinks of something to say, something to keep Yuuri’s soft smile on his face, but before he knows it, they’re already in front of Yuuri’s apartment building. The 10-minute walk from the restaurant was impossibly short. 

Viktor can’t help but control the shiver that he feels at the sight of the building, and he sneaks a peek at Yuuri who looks impossible calm. Is Viktor the only one thinking about the last time he was here?

“I’ll dance for you,” Yuuri murmurs, his eyes half-lidded, and Viktor is thrown back into the days of when all he knew about Yuuri was the way his eyes burned dark in want and lust. He swallows nervously, almost forgetting just what exactly they were talking about, what exactly Yuuri means to show him.

“Where?” Viktor’s voice cracks. It’s so unlike him that Viktor winces. He feels cracked open, so vulnerable in front of Yuuri.

Yuuri frowns in contemplation and looks around them. His eyes suddenly light up, even brighter than it already was, and he turns to face Viktor. There’s a mischievous smile on his lips.

“Follow me,” Yuuri says. He winks, holding out his hand, and Viktor doesn’t think before he takes it. He lets Yuuri lead him, realizing that he’d follow him anywhere, and isn’t that crazy? All for a man he barely knows.

Yuuri drags him over to the parking lot tucked into the side of the building. This is where Viktor had parked his car the last time and the silence and the darkness that seems to surround them just remind him how alone they are. There’s a spot where there are no cars parked, just the asphalt and an open space the size of Viktor’s studio, lit up only by the lamp post and the moonlight. Yuuri stares at it, eyes calculating in a way that Viktor’s never seen before, and his eyes rove over Yuuri’s face in an effort to understand and see through this man.

Yuuri turns and suddenly, Viktor finds himself pressed against the lamp post and he can’t breathe, all he knows is Yuuri looking up at him with wide, blown-out pupils and the way Yuuri’s alcohol-scented breath fans out on his chin. Yuuri’s body is warm and hard against his front, and Viktor can’t control the instinctive desire he feels.

“Don’t take your eyes off me,” Yuuri breathes. Viktor’s heart pounds against his ribs. He can’t do anything but nod, not trusting himself to say anything in response. Yuuri pulls away from him, taking away the warmth and Viktor immediately misses it, misses the feel of Yuuri’s body against his.

Yuuri stands in front of him, body relaxed and loose, shifting as he settles into position.

And then he moves. ‘Move’ is too simple of a word, and even ‘dance’ doesn’t come close enough to describe the way Yuuri is turning and twisting, impossibly delicate and strong with only the dim lights as his background.

It’s not the first time Viktor’s seen him dance, but this time it’s different. All he can do is stare, stunned at the beautiful, graceful wonder that is Yuuri Katsuki. He feels like he’s having an out of body experience, like he’s transcended human experience. It’s the only possible explanation for why he can hear music right now, impossibly loud in his ears, such a strange juxtaposition to the silence that had followed them from the restaurant.

Every move Yuuri makes, the flick of his wrist, the tilt of his head, the extension of his leg, it melds into and forms an achingly familiar melody that Viktor feels like he should recognize. His fingers twitch, and maybe it’s the way Yuuri extends his arm out to him in a moment suspended in time that Viktor realizes what exactly he’s dancing to. His jaw goes slack; his eyes widen with wonder.

There’s no mistaking it now that Viktor knows which piece Yuuri is dancing to, and his heart swells, too big for his chest. Viktor doesn’t feel capable enough to deal with this. There’s no way he can be wrong, not with the way Yuuri’s every move looks like he’s reaching out to something, someone, anything.

Out of all the songs Yuuri could have danced for him, he picks this one. Viktor covers his mouth, ignoring the pinpricks of tears in his eyes. Memories of his very first piece, the piece that launched him into the scene, fill his mind.

History Maker.

Viktor is in love. He’s in love with Yuuri Katsuki.

His heart aches, his chest tight at the unwanted realization. When Yuuri slips out of his ending pose and stumbles back to him—for a moment, Viktor forgets everything in face of Yuuri Katsuki and the way his body moves, the way he smiles at Viktor and the way his eyes sparkle and—

Viktor doesn’t know who moves first, but suddenly, their lips are pressed together and Viktor moans, embarrassingly loud. His hands wrap around Yuuri’s hips and Yuuri grips his forearms, tilting his head to the side and deepening their kiss. 

It’s everything Viktor’s been wanting, everything he’s been dreaming about the past weeks, and he closes his eyes, grip tightening on Yuuri’s hips. He pulls Yuuri towards him until their bodies are flush together.

Yuuri gasps against his lips, his fingers flexing around Viktor’s arms before he slides them up past Viktor’s shoulders, one hand coming up to tangle in Viktor’s hair at the back of his head. Viktor licks into his mouth, body impossibly warm and tight at the pleased, little moans erupting from Yuuri. 

They part, just for a moment, for air, and Yuuri breathes heavily as he looks up at Viktor through his eyelashes. The light from the lamp post frames his face and makes him look divine, unreal, like he’s stepped out of Viktor’s dreams. Viktor leans in again, his mind blanks as their lips press against each other. Yuuri kisses like he needs to breathe, and the only way he can get air is through Viktor’s mouth. Viktor loves it, loves how alive he feels. 

The giddiness in his veins is a familiar burn, achingly similar to what he felt when they danced together during Chris's birthday—Viktor’s mind stutters.

His lips go slack, his hands loosening, and Yuuri slides his lips against Viktor’s, unaware.

Viktor pulls away, his whole body tense, and Yuuri leans in, trying to chase after Viktor’s lips. Viktor places a hand on Yuuri’s chest, stopping him from coming any closer, and Yuuri’s eyes flutter open.

“What’s wrong?” Yuuri breathes out.

Viktor shudders. He opens his mouth, and he doesn’t know what to say, doesn’t know if he’s going to accuse Yuuri or blame him or apologize and cry.

His phone dings, loud in the silence.

Viktor pulls it out. Immediately, he wishes he didn’t.

**take care of yuuri pls**, it says.

His hand trembles and silently, he pockets his phone.

“Viktor…” Yuuri says quietly, his hand coming up as if to touch Viktor’s face, and Viktor slaps it away. Yuuri’s eyes widen, his red kissed lips parting, and Viktor can’t, he can’t, he can’t do this. He stumbles away from Yuuri as if being near him burns and it does, it burns in all the wrong places inside of Viktor.

“Fuck you,” he bites out. His surroundings go hazy around him; he’s hardly aware of the harsh, quick breaths that he’s taking. Yuuri takes a step back in shock at his harsh tone, and Viktor’s blood boils.

“What?” Yuuri asks, shrinking into himself, his arms coming up to wrap around his body defensively. 

Viktor laughs, harsh and raw and hurt. “Do you give it up to every guy who shows even a mild interest in you?” he snaps, and Yuuri’s face crumples unattractively. Viktor’s hands tremble, his chest heaving. He’s so fucking angry that he’s fallen into Yuuri’s hands and lips again as if he didn’t learn his lesson the last time. 

“Are you that desperate?” Viktor doesn’t know where his words are coming from, but it’s hitting Yuuri and making him hurt, and Viktor’s own heart hurts, but Yuuri deserves this. “You’re pathetic.” 

_ I’m pathetic _ , Viktor thinks. Everything he’s saying, he’s saying it to himself too, taking it out on Yuuri.

Yuuri’s lips wobble. Viktor’s heart skips a beat when he sees actual tears brimming under Yuuri’s eyes. How can he stand there and look hurt after everything he’s done, as if Viktor is the one in the wrong?

“I don’t understand,” Yuuri whispers.

Viktor smiles at him, wide and fake and bright.

“Chris deserves better,” he says.

He walks away from Yuuri, just like how he should have done earlier, and leaves him alone in the parking lot underneath the moon and the lamp post.

The walk back is long and lonely, and he considers calling a cab but dismisses the idea immediately. He needs to fucking clear his mind.

There’s no changing what Viktor’s already done and the mistakes he’s already made, but Viktor can change what he does now. He calls Chris, his heart racing in anticipation and fear. Maybe Chris is busy because he doesn’t pick up. 

He doesn’t know if Chris will ever forgive him. He doesn’t know if he’ll ever be able to forget the way Yuuri looked at him, crumpled and broken. He doesn’t know which one is worse.

He calls and he calls, but Chris still doesn’t pick up. With every miscall and unanswered text that passes, Viktor feels worse and worse. He feels like he’s drowning in shame and guilt, overwhelmed at the thought that maybe Chris knows already, maybe Chris is ignoring his texts for a reason.

Viktor finds himself back in his own apartment, and he’s not 100% sure how he made it here, but he’s not going to ask. He collapses against his couch and draws his knees up to his body, pressing his head on them. His body shakes, the first of his silent sobs passing through his body. How could he have fucked up this bad?

Viktor never cries. He doesn’t let himself be weak, but everything just feels so overwhelming and the thought of losing Chris (losing Yuuri) hits him harder than he thought it would. He should have told Chris sooner. He could have avoided this, could have avoided another encounter with Yuuri and his dangerous smile. If he had told Chris earlier, Chris would have never trusted him alone with Yuuri again.

He calls one more time, and still, Chris doesn’t answer. Viktor is barely aware of Makkachin in front of him, wagging her tail curiously. Everything feels wrong. Viktor’s never fucked up to this extent before.

His phone rings.

Viktor answers it immediately, his voice spilling out uncontrollably and he can’t hide his anguished, broken tone. “Chris.”

“Viktor?” Chris’s voice comes out tinny from the other end. Viktor clenches his eyes shut at the worry and concern he can hear in his friend’s voice. He doesn’t deserve him. Chris deserves better.

“Fuck!” He curses and his grip tightens around his phone. Makkachin whines, but Viktor ignores her, pressing the palm of his hand to his eye.

“Viktor…”

“I’m sorry,” he breathes out, wincing at how tight with shame his voice is. He won’t be surprised if Chris can tell what’s happened just with the way his voice sounds right now.

“I…What? Sorry about what?” Chris asks, and Viktor lets out a long breath. He’s still so afraid. He doesn’t want to say it out loud and make it real that he’s betrayed Chris in the worst possible way.

“I should have told you sooner. I’m sorry. You’re one of my closest friends; I didn’t want to do this to you.” Viktor says quietly. Chris doesn’t reply, doesn’t say anything. Viktor pushes himself to continue, his voice a haunted whisper, “I couldn’t help it. He’s just so beautiful.” The moment he says it, he knows he shouldn’t have. It’s too honest, it’s not something he wants Chris to hear, but at the same time, he knows he has to say it anyway.

“Yuuri?” Chris asks as if to confirm, and why would he need confirmation? Who else could it be?

“Yes,” Viktor chokes out anyway. “I’m sorry,” he repeats thickly.

“Tell me what happened,” Chris says softly, and Viktor can hear the wobble of fear in his tone. 

Viktor takes in a deep, long breath, and he doesn’t want to, but he needs to, he has to or this guilt will stay with him forever. Chris deserves to know. Yuuri would probably never tell Chris. Something holds him back, but Viktor pushes past it anyway. _ Chris deserves to know _ , he deserves this much after all their years of friendships.

“We were drunk, I’m sorry, I know that’s no excuse,” he rushes out and Chris is silent on the other end for far too long. He bites down another curse and kicks at his table with a loud slam. “I…We, we hooked up again,” Viktor continues in reluctant, biting words.

“Again?” Chris repeats, and Viktor shudders. There’s a pause, and then, “When was the first time?”

Here, Chris would hate him. Viktor breathes heavily, fighting with the voices inside of him that are telling him to shut up.

“When I brought Yuuri home after your birthday,” he finally admits, and it’s painful. His admission of guilt and the secret he’s been keeping is too much for him. 

There’s a sharp inhale on the other line, and then Chris  _ laughs _ .

“That’s the secret you’ve been keeping from me?” Chris asks, and there’s no malice, no anger in his tone, not like what Viktor expected when he’d imagined finally coming clean to Chris.

“I, yes, I couldn’t stop myself the first time, I’m so fucking sorry, I was too drunk to think straight,” Viktor rambles. He wasn’t, he was sober enough to know it was wrong. He doesn’t know why he’s lying now to make himself look better to Chris. He doesn’t think anything he says could make him look better in Chris’ eyes anyway.

“I let him,” Viktor admits, “We went inside his apartment and he sucked me off, but that was it, I promise, I left right away.” Chris is scarily silent, and Viktor takes it as his cue to keep talking.

“And awhile ago, after you left…he kissed me again, and I let him. We made out, but then you texted me and I left, but fuck, Chris, I told you this was a bad idea,” he says harshly, wincing again at the second white lie. Was Yuuri really the one who initiated the kiss earlier? He doesn’t know. He rubs at his face furiously. “Or I kissed him, I don’t know,” he admitted.

“Um,” Chris says slowly, and the tone of his voice is too similar to how patronizing he is sometimes that Viktor feels a little thrown off. “Why are you apologizing though?”

Viktor goes deathly still.

What? What.

“What do you mean?” Viktor asks. He can barely hear himself. 

Chris huffs in reply. “I mean, why are you apologizing to me? I get the first time, it could be taken as you taking advantage of Yuuri while he’s drunk, or I don’t know, how does that work when you’re drunk too—but…he was tipsy awhile ago, yes, but—”

“What?” Viktor interrupts, and the sudden surge of dread he feels overwhelms the shame and guilt he was previously feeling.

“Why are you apologizing for kissing Yuuri?” Chris clarifies, his voice tinged in frustration. “Babe, I’ve been trying to push you and Yuuri together the past two and a half weeks, I can see how much you’re pining for him. Yuuri’s been crushing on you for  _ god knows _ how long.”

“I…What?” Viktor says. Numb. He feels numb inside. He doesn’t understand. Nothing makes sense, nothing is right. He feels like his entire world’s been forced off its axis.

“You are two of my favorite people in the world. I just want two of my friends to get their heads straight and be happy with each other,” Chris says calmly.

“Friends?” Viktor repeats and suddenly, everything makes sense. “Yuuri isn’t your boyfriend,” he says slowly.

“No?” Chris bursts into laughter. “Where did you even get that idea?”

“I assumed, at your birthday—“

“The whole time,” Chris cuts him off, his own realization dawning on him, “you thought he was my boyfriend.”

The realization hits him hot and heavy in his gut.

“I thought he was your boyfriend,” he repeats, his eyes wide. 

The two of them go silent, both of them taking it in. Viktor’s mind races as he reevaluates every interaction he’s had so far with Chris and Yuuri, how  _ wrong _ he was. 

But how? Everything seemed right, how could Chris and Yuuri not be together? He feels cold inside at the memory of what he said to Yuuri and how he left him behind in the parking lot.  _ Fuck _ . Yuuri probably thinks he’s such a fucking asshole. Viktor wouldn’t blame him.

“Блядь,” Viktor says softly.

“Блядь,” Chris repeats, and it sounds so wrong coming out of Chris’s German mouth that Viktor can’t help but laugh in surprise.

“I fucked up,” he says simply.

Chris snorts. “You fucked up,” he agrees.

_ Fix it _ , his mind whispers and it sounds like Chris, that fucking asshole.

“I’m going to call him,” Viktor murmurs to the real Chris and his friend hums in approval, a short “Go,” his only reply.

Viktor calls Yuuri, and he feels even more nervous than earlier when he was trying to call Chris. 

What if Yuuri doesn’t forgive him after everything he’s said?  _ Fuck _ . He implied Yuuri was a slut. He called Yuuri desperate. He called Yuuri pathetic. Viktor doesn’t think he’d forgive himself if he was Yuuri.

Yuuri doesn’t pick up. Viktor stares at his phone, takes in a deep breath, and calls again.

This time, someone picks up.

“Yuuri,” he says, but it’s all he can get out before a harsh, foreign voice cuts him off.

“Listen up, Hua Kuai.”

Viktor winces. He doesn’t know what the word means, but the venom in the tone is enough to tell it’s nothing good.

“I don’t know what the fuck’s wrong with you, but don’t ever fucking talk to Yuuri again.”

“I’m sorry,” Viktor rasps out. “I thought—I misunderstood the situation, please, let me talk to him,” he begs, closing his eyes. He’s not even ashamed at how desperate he must sound and how vulnerable his voice is. All he can remember is the way Yuuri had looked at him, at how broken Yuuri had looked when Viktor had accused him.

“You don’t deserve him,” the voice snaps. “He deserves better.”

Viktor is thrown back his own words, the very same thing he said to Yuuri earlier.

“Please,” he says. His voice cracks. He doesn’t care.

“Back off, asshole.”

Viktor’s phone goes silent as they hang up.


	5. Chapter 5

_ “Hey, this is Yuuri! I’m um, busy probably. Sorry! Try calling me back later but, uh, leave a message if you want.”  _

“Hey...This is Viktor. Yuuri, please call me back. I’m sorry, god, I'm so sorry. I just want to explain.” A harsh breath. "I'm sorry. You deserve better, I understand if you don't want to talk to me, I know I fucked up, but please...Please let me explain."

*

_“Hey, this is Yuuri! I’m um, busy probably. Sorry! Try calling me back later but, uh, leave a message if you want.” _

"I didn't mean what I said about you, okay? God, just thinking about what I said...what I called you. You're not desperate or—_pathetic_—you're amazing. It was my fault. I'm sorry."

*

_ “Hey, this is Yuuri! I’m um, busy probably. Sorry! Try—." Click. _

*

"I can't believe you sent him all of this," Yuri disdainfully says as he scrolls through the multitude of texts. He clicks out, and then snorts when he sees the multitude of rejected calls on his log. “You’re fucking disgusting. You’re acting like you’re his ex-boyfriend, and he just dumped you.” 

Viktor doesn't respond from where he's lying down on the floor, only covers his face and groans. He _knows_, he doesn't need Yuri to tell him so.

Beside him, Mila makes a noise that could almost be described as sympathetic. She pats his hair, and solemnly, she says, "I have never meet anyone as Extra as you." 

Viktor slips his hand off his face, and he turns his head to give her a cool look. Mila is unfazed, giggling as she shakes her head. She lowers her voice, leaning in closer, playful as she says, "You know that's saying something, considering that we're friends with Georgi."

The three of them share a snicker at that and a tiny smile graces Viktor's face, the first in how many days. They glance at Georgi who's draped over his piano, a forlorn look on his face as he resolutely ignores the three of them. Viktor's not even sure if he was listening to their conversation and his previous whines about Yuuri Katsuki. He won't be surprised if Georgi is too caught up in his own musings of Anya. 

But really...Viktor isn't any better. He never thought he'd see the day he could actually relate to and understand what Georgi felt.

"I don't know how I could be that stupid," he whines. "I should have asked in the first place if he was actually even dating Chris."

"Yeah, well, you're a fucking idiot and we all knew that already," Yuri snaps.

Viktor's eyebrows fly up his forehead, and he sits up, his lips drawing flat. "My," he drawls, "as if _you_ didn't think they were together too."

Yuri glares at him. "Yeah, because you _told _me they were, old man. Fuck off." He tosses—_throws_ Viktor's phone back at him and Viktor catches it, not even fumbling.

He grunts, sliding his hands up his hair. He shakes his head. "None of you are helping. You're really hurting my feelings." Disgruntled, he pushes himself up to stand, gently nudging Mila away from him.

"If I could suggest," Georgi pipes up, voice a shock. He really hadn't thought Georgi was listening. "Maybe you should make the effort to go to him yourself. Much harder to ignore you in real life than ignore your texts or calls."

Viktor's eyes light up.

"Nooooo," Yuri groans, standing up as well. He grabs Viktor's arm and vigorously shakes it. "Don't listen to _Georgi_ of all people! That is not a good idea.”

Too late, Viktor is already making plans. He shimmies out of Yuri's grip, ignoring Yuri's crows to stay, _damn it_, and gathers his things.

"Viktor!" Yuri calls, voice rising in pitch, but Viktor resolutely ignores him. He checks if he has everything, his phone, wallet, keys, and nods to himself. The last thing he hears before he leaves is Yuri, groaning, “I fucking swear Georgi! Why would you encourage him to be creepier than he already is!”

*

Viktor stands in front of Yutopia again. The sight of it is familiar, but the curl of nervousness in his gut is not. 

He doesn't even know if Yuuri's on shift right now. He's pretty sure that Yuuri didn't normally take the lunch shifts, at least not everyday. The thought of how Yuuri probably took time out of his busy schedule just so he could serve Viktor in his restaurant sends a bolt of guilt and shame straight into Viktor's heart. Viktor has never felt as much shame and guilt as he has in the short span of time he's known Yuuri Katsuki. It used to be unfamiliar to him, but now it's all he knows, all he feels, all he can think about. 

If once he was guilty of the want he felt and the way he thought of his best friend's boyfriend—now, all he can feel is guilt in the way he treated Yuuri. It's a tangible thing in his chest, painful as it takes up space and expands. Just the thought of the _look_ on Yuuri's face after Viktor spat out all those disgusting words is enough to make Viktor wince.

All he can do now is hope that Yuuri would be here. That Viktor will get to talk to him and explain himself. 

Viktor stares at the entrance and inhales, his breath shaky. Even his hands are trembling, and he tucks them into his chest, forcing himself to breathe slow and even as he tries to work up the courage to get his ass out of his car.

What is Viktor even thinking by going here? How could Viktor think that Yuuri wanted him here after Yuuri's ignored all the 75 texts and the 20 calls Viktor made during the weekend?

(No, Viktor totally didn't count...)

Maybe Yuri was right, maybe this was a bad idea.

Yuuri probably doesn't want him here but...the least Viktor could do is try. If Viktor even has a tiny chance at seeing Yuuri smile the way he used to smile at Viktor, then Viktor was going to take that chance and run with it.

Viktor sighs to himself, the sound loud in his empty car. He opens the door and steps out, locking it behind him. He shifts his shoulders back and lifts his chin, trying to inject the confidence and self-assuredness he's so used to feeling. 

He barely even makes it to the entrance of Yutopia before it slams open, Mari on the other end. Her face is stormy, her eyes wild and her mouth bared in a snarl. Viktor stalls uncertainly, his eyes wide. He opens his mouth to say something, but Mari beats him to it. 

"_What," _she says coldly, "do you think you're doing here?" She doesn't raise her voice. Viktor finds she doesn't need to. The ice in her tone is enough to send a wave of fear through his veins.

"I, I," he stutters and winces. He clears his throat and shakes his head. This isn't like him. Viktor Nikiforov is calm and collected in face of anything that would try to make him feel uncertain.

"I just wanted to eat here," he says, but he can barely hear himself over the rushing in his ears. He forces a bright, practiced smile on his face, but it immediately fades at the look Mari gives him.

"Try again."

Viktor sighs, his shoulders slumping. He feels so small and lost. "I want to see Yuuri," he says, small and pitiful. 

Mari smiles at him, but it does nothing to ease the fear in Viktor's veins. It reminds him to much of his own fake smiles. A little too sharp and a little too wide.

“I appreciate the honesty," she says,"but you can't." 

Mari gives him another smile and shuts the screen door.

Viktor's jaw drops.

"Mari!" He calls, hurrying closer. He knocks, his fist thudding dully against the wood. "Please," he begs. "I need to talk to Yuri. I just want to apologize, I know I fucked up. I know it's my fault. Please, I just want to make it up to him."

There's silence on the other end, long and drawn out. Each second makes Viktor feel even more desperate.

And then, without warning, the door opens once more. Mari glares at him. 

"Do I have to say it outright? You hurt my brother. You're not welcome here. Ever."

"I made a mistake," Viktor starts.

"Yes you did." Mari cuts him off. "Glad you know that."

Viktor falters, his hands cupping close to his chest, and he just stares at her. Forlorn and weary, pleading now. "Please," he says softly. It makes him feel vulnerable but Viktor doesn't know how else to convince her.

Mari hums, unconvinced, and Viktor stares back at her.

Finally, Mari sighs.  “I promised Yuuri I wouldn’t let you in here," she says, almost apologetic, "but you can always try at the studio.”

Viktor exhales roughly. "Thank you," he breathes.

*

_ “Hey, this is Yuuri! I’m um, busy probably. Sorry! Try calling me back later but, um, leave a message if you want.” _

“Hey. This is Viktor. Just wanted to let you know I dropped by Yutopia. Your sister loves you a lot. I… I can see why. I’m not giving up on you, okay? I just wanted to let you know I'm dropping Yuri off the studio later...If you want to avoid me, that's fine. Please text me back.”

* 

“Yuuri won’t be here today.” Yuri glares at him before Viktor even has a chance of looking in Yuri’s studio. “He only helps with the Thursday class. Check the ballroom studio, he’s probably there.”

“Aww,” Viktor croons and reaches out to squish Yuri’s cheeks but Yuri immediately bats his hand away. “Thank you!” he chirps.

Yuri rolls his eyes in response.  “Yeah, yeah,” his cousin grunts as he looks away. “I’m just doing this so you’ll stop being so whiny, idiot.”

“Sure!” Viktor agrees immediately, nodding his head enthusiastically as he tries to hide his smile. Yuri scowls at him and kicks at him with his ballet flats on. Viktor smirks and darts away.

Viktor isn’t sure where exactly the ballroom studio is, but he’s pretty sure he can ask around. He ambles around, trying to look casual until he sees someone vaguely familiar. He frowns and squints his eyes slightly at the Latino man with shoulder length hair.

“Excuse me!” He calls out and the other man doesn’t even mind him, his head bobbing slightly. Viktor catches a glimpse of white ear buds in his ears and he rolls his eyes at himself before he jogs slightly to the younger man.

“Excuse me,” he repeats, tapping the shoulder in front of him lightly. The man looks up, eyes wide before he pulls out his earphones.

“Yes? Sorry.”

“Would you know where the ballroom classes are?” Viktor asks, smiling widely and the other man smiles slightly before he nods.

“I can bring you there actually, I was just on my way to class,” he says casually and Viktor nods enthusiastically.

“That would be amazing! Thank you!” he replies enthusiastically and the other man laughs slightly.

“I’m Leo by the way,” he offers as he nods towards a direction. Viktor follows after him, mentally applauding himself for finding such a helpful kid. They enter a hallway, a single elevator at the end of it, and Leo immediately presses on the up button.

“Hey Leo,” Viktor chirps, “My name’s Viktor.”

Leo stiffens. Viktor sees his smile visibly tighten and fall.

“Viktor,” Leo repeats, his voice oddly flat. Viktor’s hand twitches.

“Ah. Yes.” He hesitates. “Viktor Nikiforov.”

Leo looks up at him, a calculating look in his gaze. Viktor frowns.

“Is everything okay?” he asks airily in an effort to keep his voice casual. Leo gives him an unreadable look just as the elevator lets out a loud ding as it arrives on their floor. It opens to reveal a tiny Chinese boy with a light flush on his cheeks. His eyes visibly light up in recognition at the sight of Leo, his lips curving upwards into an adorable smile, but just as his mouth opens in a possible greeting, Leo speaks up.

“Everything’s fine, Viktor Nikiforov.” Leo replies, and there’s an emphasis to his name that Viktor can’t ignore. The teen in the elevator visibly jolts in realization before he shoots Viktor with a sudden, intense glare that shouldn’t be as scary as it is on a face as innocent as that.

Leo steps inside the elevator and Viktor makes to follow, but he hasn't even taken one step inside the elevator before the Chinese teen steps forward and places a hand on his chest. Viktor stumbles backwards in surprise as the boy pushes him back with unexpected strength. He gapes in surprise at the small teen.

“You’re not allowed to see Yuuri,” the teen says darkly, and Viktor’s eyes widen. He takes another step, looking at the two of them in a new light. Of course Yuuri would have friends here.

“Sorry not sorry,” Leo says. He sends Viktor a half-hearted shrug. 

All Viktor can do is watch as the elevator doors close. Leo and the other teen don't look away from him, their gazes challenging and dark. 

*

_ “Hey, this is Yuuri! I’m um, busy probably. Sorry! Try calling me back later but, um, leave a message if you want.” _

“Wow! You have great friends." An awkward laugh. "I’m sorry, Yuuri. I’ll try again.”

*

“What’s the difference between being romantic and being a creep?” Yuri asks him, his voice flat, just as Viktor’s about to leave to visit Yuuri’s apartment. Viktor blinks at him in confusion and he frowns. There’s nothing good in Yuri’s expression.

“What?” he asks carefully.

Yuri smirks.  “If the other person likes them.”

Viktor huffs and crosses his arms. “What are you trying to say, Yura?” He asks and Yuri shrugs innocently. Innocent is a good look on him. Yuri is far too beautiful to be angry all the time. But alas, the world was cursed instead with an angry kitten.

“I’m just saying. If Yuuri doesn’t like you, you showing up in all of his safe places isn’t going to do anything to endear you to him.”

Viktor pouts. He looks at the door forlornly. He’s pretty sure that Yuuri likes him. Or, well, at least he did before Viktor fucked up his chance with him. He just had to have faith that Yuuri still liked him enough to not think he was being creepy now.

He was already far too used to family, friends and boyfriends calling him too much or too overwhelming. It wouldn’t be too far of a cry to assume that Yuuri would be one of them before they even got together.

“I need to try. I’ve got nothing to lose.”

“Except maybe your pride,” Yuri grumbles and Viktor sighs.

“My pride is worth nothing compared to Yuuri Katsuki,” Viktor says seriously. Yuri gives him an unamused stare.

Viktor is a little scared by how much he really means it.

*

He steels himself for a moment before he raises up a fist.

Viktor knocks on the door. He has to admit, he’s getting some A+ war flashbacks here of the night of Chris’ banquet. Just the sight of Yuuri’s apartment door makes him remember the scene post-blowjob: Viktor stumbling out of his apartment and Yuuri on his knees looking up at him with confusion.

There’s a shuffling sound of feet, and Viktor shifts his weight awkwardly as the sound of feet become louder. He’s pretty sure Yuuri is standing right in front of him, just on the other side of the door. He brushes a hand through his hair self-consciously. He didn’t even get the chance to look at the mirror before he got here, what was he thinking? What if he doesn’t look presentable? What if Yuuri thinks he’s ugly or something?

The footsteps start again, but this time, it gets fainter and fainter as if Yuuri is walking away from the door.

Viktor pouts and raises his fist to knock again. Was Yuuri going to straight out ignore him and just leave him waiting outside?

Just as he’s about to knock again, the door opens. Viktor lowers his fist and his eyebrows furrow in confusion at the manman on the other side of the threshold. He looks up at the the silver numbers on the door just to check if he was actually in Yuuri’s apartment.

It’s right, this should be Yuuri’s apartment…

“Ah, is this Yuuri Katsuki’s apartment?” he asks just in case to clarify. The other man smiles at him, bright and dangerous. He’s wearing a hoodie and leggings, a slight pop to his hip as he stands in front of Viktor.

“Yes, this is our apartment,” the man confirms cheerfully. Viktor smiles, a little taken of guard. There’s something familiar about his voice that Viktor feels like he should know.

“Is Yuuri here? I’d like to speak to him,” Viktor asks, and the man’s smile widens. Viktor shivers slightly. There's too much teeth in his smile.

“Viktor Nikiforov,” the other man drawls, his voice sickly sweet, “have you ever wondered if hamsters can be trained to eat people?”

“Um,” Viktor stutters, taken aback. Did he hear right? “What?”

The man laughs airily at his obvious discomfort.  “Didn’t I tell you to back off, hua kuai?” He sings.

Viktor pales. Finally, he realizes this is the same man who answered Yuuri's phone the night he had fucked up. He reaches up and adjusts the collar of his shirt, laughing nervously.

“Please let me to talk to him,” he says.

The man lets out a harsh breath, and just as he does, three hamsters pop out of his hoodie and squeak up at him. Their beady eyes are trained right at Viktor, and Viktor chokes on his spit as their eyes seem to glint.

“Would you like to test it out?” the man asks innocently, ignoring Viktor’s request. “If hamsters can be trained to eat people, I mean.”

Viktor stares at the three hamsters.

He’s 99% sure that hamsters are vegetarian.

Unfortunately, the 1% is enough to make him high tail it out of there and back into his safe, hamster-free car.

*

Viktor's always been a sloppy drunk. He doesn't know how many drinks he's had, but eventually, he finds himself sprawled out on the bar table in front of him and his shirt missing.

Chris listens to him moan loudly about his failures in getting Yuuri to talk to him, oddly silent.

The only thing he's offered and the only thing Viktor learns is that Yuuri hasn't been replying to him either and has been skipping pole dancing class.

"Chris," Viktor whines and hiccups slightly. "Please," he pleads. "Help me talk to Yuuri. I need to talk to him."

Chris just stares at him pitifully, his own green eyes just slightly less glassy than Viktor's.

"Promise me," Viktor begs. "If you have the chance to talk to Yuuri, please make a way so that I can talk to him.”

"I promise," Chris swears solemnly and Viktor almost sobs. If it wasn’t for Chris’ tight grip on his arm, Viktor would have fallen on his knees right then and there.

Viktor doesn’t think much about Chris’ promise. Chris could do many things, but Viktor was beginning to accept that Yuuri was stubborn as fuck and would probably avoid him forever. And the thing is, Viktor knows he deserves it. He wouldn't blame Yuuri if he never wanted to see Viktor again. He just wanted to see Yuuri one last time... He just wanted Yuuri to know he didn't mean anything he had said.

He wasn’t sure what Chris could do in face of Yuuri Katsuki.

Viktor doesn’t think much about it, that is, until Chris messages him.

_ Lunch tomorrow. Usual place. _

_ * _

When Viktor enters the restaurant, he immediately spots Chris, his tall form and blonde hair distinct in a crowd. There's a man beside him, handsome even from a distance, and in front of Chris, sits someone else. Viktor can only see the back of his head, but he can tell with a sure knowing that it's Yuuri. Viktor's shoulders drop in relief, even as his heart starts to pound faster in his chest. He's starting to feel a little dizzy with how nervous he is. He's been trying so hard to talk to Yuuri the past few days, he doesn't even know what to do with himself now that he can actually see Yuuri. 

He makes his way towards the table, his grip tightening. Yuuri isn’t even looking at him, his gaze is on the table, but Chris looks up as he approaches. He meets Viktor's gaze readily, a worried twist to his lips. Viktor winces at the thought that Chris was probably concerned about Viktor’s possible behavior.

“Hello,” he greets, a little hesitantly as he holds out a bouquet of flowers. At the sound of his voice, Yuuri immediately stiffens. Slowly, he turns his head, looking up. Viktor isn’t prepared for the stormy brown eyes that meet his. Yuuri’s eyes drop down to the flowers in his grip, and for a moment, his eyes light up in surprise and his cheeks flush. But the moment passes quickly, gone in a flash as Yuuri shakes his head and returns his gaze up to Viktor’s, a hard look in his eyes. 

Viktor winces at the steel in them, and he should have expected it, but when Yuuri stands up and turns his back on Viktor, his face still falls as a burst of bitter disappointment hits him.

Yuuri makes to leave, his hands visibly shaking, but Chris stops him. He reaches out to grab Yuuri's hands, keeps them in between both of his. 

"Yuuri," he says, voice pained. Yuuri stills. Viktor waits for Chris to say something, but it looks like his friend’s ran out of words. But it was enough, it must be because Yuuri doesn't continue leaving. Chris drops his hold on Yuuri’s hand, and Yuuri turns around to face him, a heavy glare on his face. Viktor catches Chris wince. 

Viktor takes in a deep breath and thinks, fuck it, before he steps forward.  


“Please,” Viktor asks softly. His heart hammers loudly in his chest. He wonders if everyone can hear the desperate and vulnerable catch to his tone, or if he’s hiding it well. He hopes Yuuri can hear it, if it means that Yuuri will want to...“Stay.”  


Yuuri turns away from him wordlessly, his eyes squeezing shut. But he says nothing, and Viktor’s heart skips a beat, hope rising from within him. There’s a brief silent where none of them move, all three of them—Chris, his boyfriend and Viktor—staring at Yuuri.  


Finally, Yuuri slowly sinks back into his seat, his head still down. Chris exhales in relief. Viktor slips into his own seat right beside Yuuri and awkwardly, he presents the bouquet of flowers to Yuuri.

“Thank you,” Yuuri mutters as he takes it, holding it to his chest. Viktor’s heart flutters at the adorable sight that it makes. Yuuri still isn’t meeting his eyes but the fact that he’s sitting beside Yuuri after the past week is enough.

“So,” Chris drawls, a look of glee on his face that Viktor knows means trouble. Beside him, Chris’ boyfriend chuckles.

“Let me just reintroduce you guys,” Chris purrs. At that, Yuuri finally looks up. Viktor eyes Chris curiously, and his friend only giggles.  


“Viktor, the devastatingly handsome guy beside me is Francis,” Chris says clearly. Viktor turns his head to nod at the man beside him. “He’s my pole dancing instructor and my _boyfriend_ for the past month now.” Chris makes sure to stress on the word boyfriend, and Viktor's face heats. He grimaces, shrugging it off by laughing sheepishly, and he sees Francis shake his head in amusement, a small smile on his lips.

“And this wonderful man beside you is Yuuri,” Chris smirks deviously. “We take pole dancing together and he’s the guy you want to be _your_ boyfriend.”  


Yuuri turns bright red, a little squeak bursting out of his lips as he hides his face in the white flowers. Viktor stares at him, and he can’t deny how absolutely enamored he is. The burst of affection takes him by surprise but Viktor rolls with it and lets himself really _look_ this time without the guilt and shame holding him back. And what he sees? Viktor sighs inwardly. Yuuri is too adorable for Viktor’s own good.  


“And now,” Chris lets out a dramatic sigh, “I’m afraid that Francis and I have to take our leave.” Chris stands up and Francis automatically follows him. Yuuri’s head shoots up. He looks at Chris with panic in his eyes and Viktor tries not to cough. He's hurt, but he understands, truly.  


Chris pats Yuuri’s head. Viktor’s heart thuds as Yuuri’s eyes dart towards him and Chris in an anxious back and forth, holding the flowers even closer to his chest as a clutch for comfort. Francis takes Chris' hand, and Viktor watches as Chris smiles at Francis with unguarded affection. Viktor realizes then, that while Chris has always looked at Yuuri with nothing but affection, the way he looks at his boyfriend is completely different. There's a depth there that went beyond fondness, something more, something Viktor wants to describe as love. He hadn't been looking, too focused on Yuuri himself to see that the affection in Chris's gaze towards Yuuri was nothing but platonic.

“Tschüss!” Chris bids goodbye cheerfully before he turns his back on them and drags Francis away.

“Chris!” Yuuri yells, his eyes wide, and Viktor watches as Chris only turns around to send a wink and a kiss before he keeps walking.

An awkward silence descends upon them. Yuuri’s gaze is resolutely fixed on the table, his shoulders hunched up close to himself, and Viktor lets out a long breath. He pushes his chair, turns so he can face Yuuri.

“Look, Yuuri,” he says gently, and Yuuri peeks up from his glasses before his gaze darts away. “I’m not expecting you to forgive me. Your anger is justified. I just wanted to apologize for the way I treated you and the things I said. I know it’s no excuse, but I was angry and I was working off the assumption that you and Chris were dating and—”

“Why?” Yuuri interjects, sounding absolutely bewildered, and Viktor winces

“Ah well. It’s a long story,” he replies sheepishly.

Yuuri blinks at him.  “We’ve got time,” he offers and Viktor’s lips quirk. It’s enough of a hint that Yuuri is willing to stay and listen to him instead of run away.

“The day I met you, I was absolutely entranced at how handsome you were,” Viktor starts and immediately, Yuuri’s face turns bright red and he opens his mouth as if to cut Viktor off and deny it, but Viktor doesn’t let him, “And then later, Chris tells me about his new boyfriend and how’s going to introduce us, but I was too busy spacing out about you that I didn’t catch his boyfriend’s name.”

Viktor winces here and drops his head momentarily before he looks up again to meet Yuuri’s confused gaze, “As payback for not listening, Chris said I’ll just have to meet him during his birthday since he had a pole dancing routine prepared with him as his partner.”

“Oh,” Yuuri says softly. “That was me.”

“That was you,” he agrees. Awkwardly, he laughs.

He takes in a steadying breath and then cautiously reaches forward to take Yuuri’s hand in between his. He doesn't expect anything, but Yuuri lets him, and Viktor’s heart swells in relief and satisfaction.

“Yuuri, please let me earn your forgiveness. I promise never to assume again,” Viktor says solemnly. “I…All the things I said, the things I called you, I didn't mean it." His voice becomes fervent, desperate. "I only called you those things because—because I was thinking _I_ was pathetic. That _I _was desperate, because I've never met anyone who makes me feel the way you do. You didn't deserve any of that, and I'm so so sorry."

Yuuri stares at their hands. His voice comes out quiet, barely audible, "You hurt me a lot."

Viktor feels his heart ache, and he swallows. "I know," he whispers. "I'm really sorry. I know that doesn't help much, but I really am."

Yuuri nods, biting his lip. He looks up, finally, and says,  “I'm sorry. I think that on my side, I should have been more clear too."

"No, no," Viktor immediately denies. "How would you have thought to deny it, when you didn't even know I thought you were Chris's boyfriend? This isn't your fault."

Yuuri hides his smile at that, and Viktor feels emboldened. He relaxes, leaning in and smiling. 

“My, uh, cousin also wanted me to apologize for being generally creepy by going to all your places and sending you all those texts and voicemails,” Viktor adds. He smiles brightly at Yuuri, the edges of it straining. 

Yuuri blinks, and then his eyes go wide. "Ah," he says.  “I, um, wouldn’t know." Yuuri looks away, his gaze fixed on the plant beside them. The tips of his ears are turning red. Viktor blinks. Yuuri grimaces.

“After your first few texts and your 5th miscall, Phichit kind of just had me block your number,” Yuuri admits.

Viktor’s mouth falls opens. 

“….I sent you 170 texts the past week,” he says numbly, and Yuuri’s eyes widen. “And called you like, 40 times probably.” He groans and drops his head in embarrassment.

Yuuri bursts into laughter, and Viktor's head shoots up, his eyes wide. Yuuri looks just as shocked as he is, a hand pressed to his mouth and his eyes wide. Almost as if the laugh had slipped out without his permission.

Viktor can't help but laugh as well. “I can’t believe you’re laughing at me,” he whines, and Yuuri’s hand leaves his mouth as the younger man shakes his head and his hands wildly.

“I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to!” Yuuri blurts out.

Viktor grins.  “I was afraid it’d come across as a little creepy,” Viktor murmurs. "I'm glad you're laughing."

“It kind of is.” Yuuri says after a brief moment of silence.

“Really?” He asks aghast, pouting slightly, and Yuuri winces as he shrugs.

“Yeah," he says. Then, nonchalantly, even as his face turns red and he looks down, "You’re lucky I like you.”

Viktor ducks his head and smiles, giddy and wide.  “Yeah. I am.”

Yuuri coughs, looking away.

"I like you too," Viktor finds it important to say. "I like you a lot, Yuuri Katsuki."

Yuuri nods. He looks uncertain again, shifting in his seat, and Viktor pulls away. He doesn't want to crowd Yuuri.

"But—I want to forgive you, I know you're sorry, but..." Yuuri trails off, rubs at his chest. He looks troubled. "I'm sorry, Viktor, but I don't know if I'm ready to just jump into a relationship with you."

"That's okay," Viktor immediately says, shaking his head. "I didn't expect you to be. I know I hurt you. I didn't come here thinking we'd just be together. I just wanted to apologize."

Yuuri bites his lip. Underneath him, his feet swing, restless. He picks at the petals of the flowers Viktor gave him. "The things you said," he starts, uncertain, and Viktor stays quiet, nodding at him encouragingly when Yuuri looks at him.

"I don't know, it made me think about my own behavior a lot...Made me examine my relationship with alcohol, how it made me act so differently."

"Oh," Viktor says in surprise, and Yuuri winces.

"I guess in a way, I do use it as a clutch, so I guess I want us to develop without that. That isn't how I am."

"Of course," Viktor immediately agrees. "I mean...Yuuri, when I was visiting you restaurant, I still liked you. I liked you even more. I just like you, whether you're shy and sweet, or...confident on liquid courage."

Yuuri smiles at that, flustered. "Okay," he says. "Thank you. It will take a while, I guess, but I do want to try things with you." Yuuri says, voice small.  


"I can wait," Viktor promises. He hesitates, and then he reaches out to hold Yuuri's hands. "We can take things at your pace. Whatever you're comfortable with."

Yuuri releases a long breath. "Okay," he says. "Okay."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry, completely forgot about this. next chapter is just an epilogue to wrap things up and check in on them after a few months, but this is the spiritual end of the fic HAHA

**Author's Note:**

> will try to update this every other day, am just editing anyway. 
> 
> let me know if I'm missing any tags!
> 
> after 4 years and reading this again, i realized that viktor is/becomes kind of a dick. so. fair warning.


End file.
